Living For Christ

Running and Weariness

2010-07-12T15:10:00.002-07:00

Today has brought me to meditation upon these two words. Often times in the new testament Paul tells us that we are running a race.
In 1 Corinthians 9
24Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.
25Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last; but we do it to get a crown that will last forever. 26Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. 27No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.

In Galatians 2
2I went in response to a revelation and set before them the gospel that I preach among the Gentiles. But I did this privately to those who seemed to be leaders, for fear that I was running or had run my race in vain.

In Galatians 5
7You were running a good race. Who cut in on you and kept you from obeying the truth? 8That kind of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you.

In Hebrews 12
1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

In Philippians 2
14Do everything without complaining or arguing, 15so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe 16as you hold out[c] the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing. 17But even if I am being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. 18So you too should be glad and rejoice with me.

In 2 John 1
9Anyone who runs ahead and does not continue in the teaching of Christ does not have God; whoever continues in the teaching has both the Father and the Son.
This one seems to suggest that we can be in danger of running ahead of Him and in so doing we leave Him and His teaching.

Now, onto the weariness front -
Isaiah 40
28 Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
The LORD is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth.
He will not grow tired or weary,
and his understanding no one can fathom.
29 He gives strength to the weary
and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary,
and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD
will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not grow weary,
they will walk and not be faint.

Psalm 119
28 My soul is weary with sorrow;
strengthen me according to your word.

Matthew 11
28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Galatians 6
7Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. 8The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature[a]will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. 9Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. 10Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

Hebrews 12
1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 3Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Revelation 2
1"To the angel[a] of the church in Ephesus write:
These are the words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand and walks among the seven golden lampstands: 2I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. 3You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary.

To run in a race is hard work. It requires training. It requires effort. It requires concentration. It requires focus. This race we are running is not a 100 meter dash. It is a race that goes on every single day of our lives. Surely, running day after day all day long would make even the most disciplined of runners grow weary and burnt out on the whole running thing. It seems that many of us, as Christians, are aware that we are running a race - but we don't like to be aware of the danger of growing weary. When we grow weary we usually become idle and stagnant. We get burnt out. We almost always grow "weary of doing good". I am starting to see that the biggest problem we have is that we are self reliant. We think that we can run this race in our own strength. Sure, we come to God when we think it is something bigger than we can handle but in the small stuff - no problem, we got that covered. Sometimes even in the not so small stuff we decide that our assessment of the situation follows logic and reason and that little voice that the Spirit is speaking to us that seems so impossible gets pushed aside. Is it any wonder why we do not experience what Isaiah 40 says He will provide for us? Oh, we all love the imagery and love to quote that He will lift us up on wings like eagles...but seriously, do we trust Him to do it? Trust is a big thing. When we hear the voice of our Lord, firstly we should be aware that it is Him because if we know Him then we know His voice. Secondly, we must follow Him even if it defies what we think is 'sensible'. If it is truly His voice and His will - He will make a way! The only way we can avoid becoming weary, is to rely fully on Him. When we have nothing left, He will provide all we need when we are in His will! Every time we are told to combat weariness with considering Christ, with waiting upon the Lord, with going to Him. We are not told to combat weariness with taking a little rest or a break from what we have been called to. To do so is to follow someone who is not the one who called us.

A Humble Heart

2010-01-12T22:21:00.003-07:00

I am in absolute awe at what God has accomplished in the last year. We went through six surgeries in twelve months, the most recent occurring in November. One over-riding theme throughout the entire year has been the need for humility. A humble heart, a willing heart, and a heart of servitude. A heart that allows itself to be led by the Holy Spirit in a way that does not necessarily always go along with "reason". In recent weeks I have been struck with one thing inparticular about being humble. For so many Christians, we state the gospel message or speak of the Cross to our children, or sing worship songs in church about the sacrifice of Christ and still it merely passes over our lips and does not penetrate our hearts. Every single time we think about the mercy that was extended to us, it should have an instant humbling effect on us. That is the one thing in which we cannot boast. That is where humility starts and perhaps the only thing which can bring us into a total attitude of humility, willingness, and servitude with no hint of pride. The Cross is emphasized, but in all honesty it tends to lose its effect on most Christians as time passes. It is something that we are aware of, something that we know, and therefore we do not let it do its humbling work within us as it did when we first heard the wonderful news of the gospel! I tend to think that this is the very reason why when we are first saved we want to tell everyone, but as time passes so does the urgency. Should the impact of the Cross wane like this? It is a pity that it has. As I come before Him, I must come to Him empty of anything I might think that I can bring and in order to do that I must be aware of how unworthy I am and what an amazing sacrifice was made on my behalf. Surely, he has taken my head which is so downcast and lifted it up as only He can do! May we all give the Cross the adequate reverance and thought to allow it to penetrate the deepest parts of us and truly become a humble servant of Christ!

God's Grace

2009-07-29T19:57:00.002-07:00

Over the past seven months I have found myself in the deepest valley of desperation as well as the highest mountaintop of strength. My husband has had three surgeries since February and is preparing to have number four in a few weeks. This has been difficult in many ways but I am thankful for the way that it has brought me to my knees. It has made me fully dependant upon Him rather than man. It has humbled me and in essence lifted me up. It is ironic to me how those two things are so intertwined in God's plan!
Luke 1:52
He has brought down rulers from their thrones
but has lifted up the humble.

James 4:10
Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

1 Peter 5:6
Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.

Little did I know when I prayed that God would lift us up that it would require so much humility and basically tearing me down to the very core. But He did it in such a graceful, gentle way that it did not destroy me but rather filled me with hope and joy. It also filled me with true repentance, one that hears the word and obeys:

James 1:22-25
22Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does.

How thankful I am for the change He is bringing about in me! I know that He will indeed complete the work that He has started within me.

Spiritual Hydration

2009-07-29T14:05:00.002-07:00

It was incredible how I felt my soul calling out to God from the depths of my being even after so many months of being in a spiritual desert! There was one thing that changed everything for me.

Finding my true worth in Jesus Christ.

I was not brought up in a Christian home. I was never taught that my worth wasn't based on other people's feelings of me or things that were in this world. After I got saved, I knew that God loved me, He loved me enough to die for me. That was life changing in itself. However, my understanding ended there. I knew that He created me, I knew that He died for me, but still I did not put my worth in Him nor did it occur to me that is where it should lie. In my marriage I expected many things from my husband which were not fair to him. I expected him to fill that lack or worth that I felt. I tried to fill it with many things, all of which failed to satisfy what was an obvious need within me. In His grace, I was opened to the fact that my worth truly lies in Him. He didn't just create me out of obligation. He didn't just die for me because I had sinned. He desired me, even when I had stopped desiring Him. He wanted me to be with Him. He loves me more perfectly than anything or anyone else ever could. I had cut myself off the vine while in that spiritual desert and He graciously picked me back up and placed me back on the vine so that my little branch had worth and life again!

Upon understanding the worth that I have in God, I stopped doing things to get words of affirmation or approval from man. I started making it a priority to be in the Word, to be in prayer, to listen for His voice. It became something I longed for - just to simply be with my Creator and my Savior!

More to come....

Spiritually Dry

2009-07-28T21:40:00.000-07:00

It is a bit hard for me to admit this, but for many many months I found myself in the midst of a spiritual drought. I was not praying more than little five minute prayers. I was in the Word sporadically and it was not something that was life changing to me. I was getting depressed and frustrated with everyone and everything. I often would wonder why, when I needed it most, did the Scripture I knew not come into my head/heart and help me. I often would wonder why, when I try so hard, was I not seemingly bearing the fruit of the Spirit. I found myself tearing down with my tongue rather than building up and it bothered me immensely. After months of this dry spell and not putting two and two together, I was invited to a study on the book "The Power of a Positive Mom" by a woman I had only met on a few occassions. I entered into it rather skeptically and more or less just wanted some adult conversation. A few chapters in, I started to realize how dry I really was. I started to drink in the living water that is offered to us, and I couldn't stop. I found myself needing it more and more. I guess that is what happens when you are that dehydrated! Many things had taken place in our lives since the beginning of the year that should have sent me running to God, but instead, I tried so hard to do it on my own - failing miserably. There will be many more posts to come about what has happened and is currently happening on this journey and how God has changed me. He could have destroyed me in the state I was in, but rather He showed me gracefully and gently and led me in the Way. How thankful I am for His holiness and for His compassion!

Some Good Reading

2009-07-28T16:04:00.000-07:00

I have been immersed in some really good books lately. They have been biblically sound and have been able to help revive my soul after what was a very long, very dry spell. They were "The Power of a Positive Mom", "The Power of a Positive Wife", and "The Power of a Positive Woman" by Karol Ladd. I also just recently finished reading "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World" by Joanna Weaver. I intend to share much of what I have learned here and the incredible ways that God has been changing me, strengthening me, and working within me. In His holiness He could very well have destroyed me and showed me all of my shortcomings all at once. He could devastated me and I would have fully deserved it. Instead He very gracefully and gently showed me when He knew my heart would be ready to receive it. I didn't even know how thirsty I was until I began to drink and I haven't wanted to stop drinking since. I recommend these books to any Mom, Wife, or Woman who desires to change and go deeper in her relationship with God.

Taking a new direction

2009-07-27T21:36:00.003-07:00

I know it has been a long time since I posted. I intend to take this blog in a new direction as God has changed me over the past several months. I want to express what is taking place in my life as a wife, a mom, and a woman. I pray that God may use my stumbling words to point anyone who comes here not to me, but to the Cross. I pray you are blessed, encouraged, and inspired by what you read here.

Verse for the Week

2008-07-19T10:34:00.002-07:00

We have started a new practice around here. We have a verse for the week that will help keep me focused and keep me in an attitude and heart of prayer. I have been falling short in this area lately, and am hopeful that this will make a huge difference.

Here is the verse for this week:
Psalm 84:10-11
Better is it to spend one day in your courts
than a thousand elsewhere;
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God
than dwell in the tents of the wicked.

For the LORD God is a sun and shield
He bestows favor and honor
No good thing does he with hold
from those whose walk is blameless.

I have been meditating on this verse for a day now. It is easy just to say, yes, I agree with that. But when I started really pondering it - I thought about what this is really saying.

If it meant I would only have ONE day in eternity I would choose to spend it in your presence oh Lord because ONE day with you is far better than having a thousand or a million somewhere else. I would rather have the lowest job possible, that of a doorkeeper, who just lets people come into the house of God and never actually live there than to have the highest dwelling in the place of the wicked. I will meditate more on the second half of this as the week goes on, but for right now I have been impacted by the first part greatly. It reminds me that I need to really desire to be with Him, to desire to please Him, desire everything about Him and His Kingdom and let go of everything else that might keep me from it. I need to want Him so much that I can cast off every wicked thing.

Unexpected Encouragement

2008-06-23T11:53:00.002-07:00

Lately, I have gotten a few comments on this old post of mine. I have posted many things on this blog with no responses and now to get 2 comments in the past month on a post that I did over two years ago has encouraged me to continue on with this blog. Things have not been optimal lately, but I pray that if I continue on, even sporadically that somewhere down the line a soul will be touched or helped by something written here.

Tribute to a wonderful father

2008-06-12T10:48:00.002-07:00

From the moment he was born
I saw the love you had for him.
In that first instant
that you became a father,
I have seen such a selfless love
come upon you.

You have enjoyed him thouroughly
Not taking one moment for granted
watching him develop
into a wonderful five year old boy.

Oh how that boy adores you,
I see it in his eyes.
The special things you do with him
are the delights of his life.
How blessed he is to have a father
who looks at him as you do.

From the moment she was born,
it was obvious
that your love had grown
it now enveloped two children.
Boy and girl,
they both call you dad
and I see how she has your heart
and you have a very special place in hers.

Though she is but three,
you are so important to her
and that will only grow
as time goes by.

Blessed again were we,
with child number three
and the squeals of delight
each time you play with her
speak volumes of what you are
to that little babe.

Thank you for being
submissive to our Creator
and in turn being
such a wonderful father.

Oh how thankful I am
to go on this journey with you.
Having you by my side,
makes me a better parent.
How thankful I am,
that they call you
dad.

Fireproof the Movie Update

2008-05-24T19:57:00.002-07:00

The movie I talked about in a previous post "Fireproof" which stars Kirk Cameron and is produced by the same company as Facing the Giants is set to come out September 26th. This is going to be an awesome movie and I firmly believe it is going to change marriages, families, and countless lives in the process. We really want this movie to do well on opening weekend so I hope that you will make every effort to get out to see this movie on the 26th, 27th, or 28th of September! You can find out more here.

Training up a Child

2008-05-21T13:38:00.002-07:00

We have experienced a great breakthrough with our five year old son recently. We had been having tantrums, selfishness, and other ugliness rearing its head within him. I was beginning to feel very discouraged and as though nothing I had tried to or intended to teach him over the last 5 years had stuck. Needless to say, I was upset.

I went back to a site I had utilized a long time ago www.raisinggodlytomatoes.com . Now, I do not agree with everything she advocates but there are two things on that site that I find wonderful. The first one is the Proverbs Parenting section and the second is the section on Tomato Staking. The object is that if a tomato plant is left to itself it will be wild and unruly and it must be staked and well taken care of. The same can be true of the child. If he is left to his own he will become wild and unruly and in this case is staked to the mother. She explains it much better than I could. There are also different types of tomato staking.

I did this with my son and honestly it took two days of intense tomato staking and explaining to him everything that was going on, and teaching him responsibility and self control through various things. I had expected it to take much longer. However, our son has been incredible since we did this last week. He is exhibiting self control, he is caring for his sister, thinking of others first, showing manners, coming when he is called. All the things I thought he had "lost" have come back. Of course, it is taking some changes on my part as well (being more vigilant when something is going on, encouraging him to continue acting as he is now, telling him the good qualities that he is now showing, not letting things go when I know the heart is behind them even if it will take time and energy that I do not think I have).

My heart is encouraged again and I'd recommend any mom at least trying this method when in my situation. All children will go through stages where it becomes hard or seemingly unnecessary to make good choices and this is an excellent way to get them back on track and develop a good bond with them as well. Afterall, you are spending every minute with them (I was having to do the intense tomato staking with not having him more than three feet from me at any given time) and the entire goal is to train them to make the good choices on their own, whether it be a refresher course or doing it for the first time.

A few thoughts on Exodus Chapter 1

2008-05-21T13:31:00.000-07:00

In the first few verses we are told why the Israelites are thrown into captivity/bondage. They were enjoying the fruits of Joseph as the king had shown them favor because of him. However, once that generation had passed away and a new king came into power who did not know about Joseph, the party was over so to speak. This new king was intimidated by the sheer number of the Israelites. That is what he feared the most! He did not fear them as a people, but rather he feared them because with their numbers, he thought they could/would overthrow him. From these verses it is probably safe to say that this king was filled with pride rather than humility. So much so that all he could focus on was how to diminish the number of the Israelites. His first plan - throwing them into hard, ruthless work - did not go so well. The Israelites were able to stand under the pressure and not only did they stand but they were multiplied, they were increased in number! So, instead of realizing that God wanted the Israelites to flourish he decided to come up with another plan. This time he decided instead of killing them off by working them to death he would just kill the boys as soon as they were born. No boys meant that the Israelites would eventually dwindle to very small numbers and finally none if he kept it up long enough. However, he overestimated his power. He thought he could control the midwives to do as he said. They feared God and did not do it! Not only that, but again God saw fit to increase them in number! Talk about two failed attempts on behalf of the king! You would think that would make him open his eyes, but no. Again he has devised a plan to get rid of them. This time he wants to get rid of the boys by having them put into the Nile. We both know that one didn't work out to his liking either.

In all of this I saw a few things that really struck me:
1. They went from living well and having favor shown to them, to living in captivity under a king who wanted to kill them off. Their lives were definitely turned upside down. Everything they knew, everything they had lived prior to that was stripped from them and they were thrown into a very hostile environment.

2. Despite all of that, it is completely obvious that God did not abandon them. He thwarted every man devised scheme to get rid of them. The king did not see that though, he was determined to do evil - and Yahweh was determined to do good. You can see how that played out and who won!

3. From the point of view of the king it is seen how dangerous and blinding pride can be. To have faith within your own power is not a good thing. It is humility that brings us before our Creator, it is humility that brings us to our knees. Humility is such a vital thing...selfishness and pride cannot be what leads us and I definitely would not want to be in the king's shoes especially since we know what takes place.

When I read this it caused me to meditate on the work of Satan in the life of the Believer. Satan is classified as an imposter in the life of the convert because once one accepts the work of the stake and turns their life over to the Messiah, Jesus becomes their King. Satan however tries to come in as a "NEW" king (impersonated) He thinks he is the king and seeks to make us think he is the king. This "NEW" king doesn't KNOW (understand) the work of the Messiah and what he did for the believer and so comes in trying to "steal, kill, and destroy the "strength" and "might" of Yahshua's disciples who are growing in number fast which intimidates him. Satan considers the possibility of what they might be able to do if they grow in their christian walk and so throws all kinds of turmoil, trials, and temptations to weaken them in some way. Though the life of the believer isn't easy and oftentimes feel as though the way is full of bitter hard labor, if they endure until the end their strength will be multiplied.

What a whirlwind!

2008-05-13T22:03:00.002-07:00

I took a bit longer to come back to blogging than I thought I would. It all started with the death of Ethan Powell. I could not stop thinking about his parents and how such a small boy was taken by such a horrible disease.

Shortly after that my brother who had not been in contact with us in 3 years got in touch with my mother. It was only a week later that he informed my mom that he was in need of transportation and a place to live with his wife and eighteen month old son. He was in a Sacred Name Movement sect (I posted on this topic quite some time ago). After going to get them they made a planned trip to see us. I hadn't seen my brother in 5 years and it was a wonderful reuinion. They have a lot to overcome, but it is wonderful that they are out of this. I have longed for true heart fellowship with someone for a long time. It is something few people openly desire I'm afraid. I have wanted to go beneath the surface, study the Scriptures, and really have someone I can be transparent with. I feel that person is my new sister in law whom I only met three weeks ago. It is difficult though because they were separated from the world for so long and they are still very leary of anything to do with the world. I know that many things will change for them as the days pass and I'm trying to be a support to her without letting myself get drawn in. I have learned things from her that I plan on posting about in the future, and I think I've been able to pass some things along as well. I know this relationship will take a lot of work and patience as they continue to sort through evaluating everything they have followed for the past several years. We are studying Exodus together which I plan to post some of that here as well.

All that to say, I'm back!

Taking a break

2008-04-02T15:35:00.000-07:00

Things have me a bit down. If anyone still reads this I should be back in a week or so.

Too Funny

2008-03-22T15:15:00.000-07:00

This is one of the funniest things I've seen from a mom's point of view in quite a while. I hope you check it out.

Spring Cleaning

2008-03-22T14:27:00.000-07:00

I am attempting to do some Spring cleaning this year. We started yesterday and I am going to do toy rotation and see how it goes. I posted earlier about my struggle to get my children to pick up. Well, I figured out that half the problem was that they have too many toys for the space that we have to keep them in. Don't get me wrong, they do not have a lot of toys. It is just that in our main room it tends to get very messy very fast if they are playing with more than a couple toys at once. I boxed up about half of them yesterday so that it would be easier for my two year old to put things in their correct places and perhaps not be so daunting to them when I ask them to clean up their mess. I think this is going to help and then in a month I will switch out the toys in the box for the toys that are out and hopefully that will keep them interested as well as teach them a bit of responsibility! I also cleaned out our kitchen cupboards yesterday. I am trying to get organized and stay encouraged with this and have been checking out this blog. I haven't printed out all the sheets but she is going about it at a very doable pace and has put a lot of work into it.

Meditation

2008-03-22T13:57:00.000-07:00

Since I started going to the gym it has been the perfect place for me to meditate on scripture and pray without being interrupted. This does not happen very often if the kids are awake so I really enjoy it. Lately though I have felt a major shift in what is being called of me. My heart is being drawn unto my husband in a manner I had not known. My heart is being drawn unto my children to be more than I ever thought I could be to them. My heart is being drawn unto my friends to offer more of myself and really come into their lives in a more challwenging deeper way. My heart is being drawn unto those who are cast aside to come alongside them and let them know they are worth investing interest in. My heart is being drawn to encourage and build up and challenge where needed. When I begin to think of it all it can seem like too big a task. Yet it is not me. It is Christ. It is not my own desire but the calling of the Holy Spirit and with His power, with His love it is possible. In a way I felt like Moses at first. He asked Moses to speak and Moses said I cannot, what if I fail? God said you will not fail for it will be me but Moses again insisted he was not capable until finally God sent Aaron to speak instead. My first reaction was to respond, me? Shy, anxious, stumbling me? Yes, me but not my weaknesses - I shall do it in His strength.

Today at the gym I kept having these pictures of hosting a Bible study while kids played and praying together and of my door being opened and people coming in for fellowship, for encouragement, for Christ. Oh what joy it gave me and oh how I pray it comes to be someday! Oh, how far He has brought me, how much He has stretched me, how far I have to go!

Kitties and Princesses.

2008-03-22T13:46:00.000-07:00

I was speaking with my son today about when he will be a parent because he loves to act like he is the parent to his sister. During this conversation I did not realize my two year old daughter was listening. After our talk was finished she went and informed her brother that "boys grow up to be parents and girls grow up to be princesses". Shortly after this I told her and her brother to pick up and she was a kitty and kitties cannot pick up.

Mastitis, MOPS, and Rebellion

2008-03-19T13:23:00.002-07:00

I am again dealing with the horrible symptoms of a plugged duct and the onset of mastitis. Thankfully I have been able to keep it at bay thus far and hopefully will not have a need for antibiotics. I went to MOPS yesterday while sick if only to get a break from my two older children. It was our tea and testimony. The stories shared were truly inspirational and I am very glad that I went. Unfortunately, upon arriving home, my children got set in front of the TV for most of the day and I laid in bed for about six hours before being able to stand up without feeling like I was going to fall immediately to the floor! That brings me to the rebellion part of this post. Perhaps it is just because I am not feeling well, have a headache, and would like to just curl up under the covers once again but I am really starting to wonder why my children have such a hard time picking up after themselves. They can destroy the main room in a matter of minutes but it takes them the better part of the day to actually pick it up, if they pick it up at all. I know that most of it is my fault, now I just need to figure out how to undo the damage. I'm starting to realize that teaching children responsibility takes a whole lot of effort. I'm also realizing it isn't something I'm up to doing while ill so there are toy strung about everywhere at the moment.

A Smashing Success

2008-03-15T17:47:00.002-07:00

Well, today was the day of my son'd fifth birthday party. I was very stressed out about this gathering of 7 children five and under. Would they have fun? Would they play together? Would they even want to come in the door? Yes, they did have fun. I had enough games planned to take another two hours just in case, but that was unnecessary. In the end it only took a game of musical chairs, pin the tag on Clifford, and Hot potato to take us to cake time followed by presents and the pinata. All the mothers were right on time and every child left with a smile and a red balloon. Whew!

Fireproof

2008-03-14T16:41:00.002-07:00

I was watching TBN last night (a rarity) because I was aware that Kirk Cameron would be hosting Praise the Lord. I was pleasantly surprised when he started to run a clip from a new movie he is in. It is from the same production company that did Facing the Giants. It is about a couple who is wanting a divorce but God changes the heart of the husband. You can see the trailer and find out more at http://www.fireproofthemovie.com . I am very excited about this!

Not what I expected...

2008-03-12T15:35:00.002-07:00

After a week of trying to connect with the woman from MOPS that I mentioned earlier, she showed up at our door today. I invited her in and started to make conversation. Not much time had passed when it came up that she had a disability. A disability? Really? I honestly had not noticed. I inquired as to what it was while trying not to sound overly nosey. She told me she had Cerebral palsy. I was rather shocked. Knowing it now, I see the limp and see a few things but it had completely went unnoticed on my part until that moment. Perhaps I should've seen the signs that she had a learning disability and had trouble understanding and processing things but to me she was just a woman whom I felt God was putting it on my heart to befriend. I am ashamed to say that I was a bit upset that she did not call before stopping by and she did not appear to have much consideration for my time the days we had tried but failed to get together in this past week. Conviction is upon my heart that I might not always know the entire story and I'm obviously not the only person that matters. I am going to try very hard to make myself "available" even when not conveniently so to her and to other people as well. Maybe God isn't calling me to have an indepth Bible study with her but rather just to talk to her, invite her into our lives, be her friend, and all the while sharing Christ with her.

Marriage

2008-03-06T11:22:00.002-07:00

There has been something weighing on my heart lately. I know I probably should not be, but I am rather shocked at how people think that marriage is something you venture into for a season and when it is no longer comfortable or beneficial they throw it away. Upon finding out someone that had been married for 13 years and had 3 children decided they no longer wanted to be married to one another - I became very grieved and it has been something I have thought about often ever since.

I, sadly, have come to expect this type of thing from the Hollywood circle and even the secular one, but it is so hard for me to see it in the Christian community. While flipping the channels with my husband last night we landed on "The Moment of Truth" game show. The only question we had it on long enough to see was "Do you think you will be married to your husband for the rest of your life?". We did not see the response, but I couldn't help but wonder why they would even ask a question like that! If your answer is not yes then you have no business being married in the first place. I do understand there are circumstances in which staying married is not an option, in cases of abuse, adultery and if it is an unbeliever and believer and the unbelieving spouse no longer wants to be married, but in every other situation it should be understood that it will be worked through and divorce should never even come up.

Every time I see my husband I think of him in light of the fact that this is the man I love, this is the man I married, this is the man God has given to me and I will be with him for the rest of my life. Knowing this gives me such joy. No, things are not always perfect. However, if you are seeking God, if you are focused on Him as a Christian obviously should be, how can you just throw away a marriage because of some disagreement or you "fell out of love" or whatever the reason may be? Being married as a Christian means that you think of the other person, you find joy in their joy, you want to glorify God with this very sacred union.

Making a Switch

2008-03-05T11:18:00.002-07:00

Since my youngest daughter was born four months ago my older children have watched more television than I would like to admit. Their attitudes in the last few weeks has been atrocious so I decided to make a bit of a switch. For the last three days they have watched no TV (except for Super WHY in the morning) and instead of watching a show in the middle of the day I have put in a audio cassette tape of Adventures in Odessey. I love how they have to listen and use their minds to imagine what is going on. Their attitudes have improved significantly, they are playing together better, and I don't have to worry about them seeing an advertisement or a preview for something I'd rather they didn't. I think we might have to broaden our library of cassettes or cd's of this nature!

Psalm 25:1-25:15

2008-02-29T11:37:00.004-07:00

I'm going to be processing this one for a few days at least.

To you, O LORD, I lift up my soul,
in you I trust, O my God.
Do not let me be put to shame,
nor let my enemies triumph over me.
No one whose hope is in you
will ever be put to shame
but they will be put to shame
who are treacherous and without excuse.

Show me your ways, O LORD,
teach me your paths;
guide me in your truth and teach me,
for you are my God, my Savior,
and my hope is in you all day long.
Remember, O LORD your great mercy and love,
for they are from of old.
Remember not the sins of my youth and my rebellious ways;
according to your love remember me,
for you are good, O LORD.

Good and upright is the LORD,
therefore he instructs sinners in his ways.
He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way.
All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful
for those who keep the demands of his convenant.
For the sake of your name, O LORD, forgive my iniquity, though it is great.
Who, then, is the man that fears the LORD?
He will instruct him in the way chosen for him.
He will spend his days in prosperity,
and his descendants will inherit the land.
The LORD confides in those who fear him,
he makes his covenant known to them.
My eyes are ever on the LORD,
for only he will release my feet from the snare.

5 pounds and counting

2008-02-28T11:35:00.003-07:00

Since I started going to the gym on a regular basis and working out at home on the days that I don't make it to the gym I have lost five pounds. That was a month ago. That means I am five pounds lighter than I was when I became pregnant with my third child and if I lose another five I will be the same weight I was when I became pregnant for the first time. I am very excited about this, not because I am obsessive about my weight but because I know that I am getting back into a healthier lifestyle. Of course, losing a little weight is definitely a nice side effect.

Dollar Store Paints

2008-02-27T11:02:00.001-07:00

This happened last January but I wanted to put it here because it really made such a huge impact on me.

I was running to the grocery store with my two lovely children in tow at 4:30 on a Wednesday afternoon. I usually do not undertake such an adventure in the afternoon but this trip could not be avoided. In order to coax my three and a half year old to hurry along I told him we would stop by the dollar store and get him some paints. After rushing through the grocery store I buckled both children in the car and my son excitedly said "Yay, now we get to get my paints!". I had completely forgotten about my promise. We drove across the parking lot to the dollar store and went inside. Again in a very hurried manner I led my son to the aisle with the paints and told him to pick out two. We went to the front of the store to pay and there was only one cash register open.

The lady in front of us had a cart full of items. I was very irritated and inconvenienced since we only had two small items and was hoping she would let us ahead of her. My son started talking to her. He said, "Look what I have. I am going to paint a house and a car and a person." The lady took great interest in talking to him. Finally it was her turn and the girl started to ring up her cart full of items. When she was almost done, the lady in front of us said, "Please put those two in with mine as well." I couldn’t believe it. I sheepishly said she didn’t have to. The reason for saying this so sheepishly was the conviction that was brewing in my heart. Then she turned to us and said "I want to. I’m sorry I didn’t let you go ahead of me but I really wanted to buy these for him." The attitude I had in my heart was completely wrong and God made sure that I was fully aware of that. I witnessed such kindness and such love in this one act and I feel honored and blessed that my son was able to experience it as well. I will definitely have a different attitude the next time I am in such a situation and perhaps I will not be so hurried but instead look at the people in the store with me the way God looks at them.

Matthew 3:7-3:10

2008-02-27T08:42:00.002-07:00

But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees coming to where he was baptizing, he said to them: "You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath? Produce fruit in keeping with repentance. And do not think you can say to yourselves, 'We have Abraham as our father.' I tell you that out of these stones God can raise up children for Abraham. The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire.

Wow! Does John sound a bit irritated, if not outright angry here? He was aware of their motives and he knew it did not please God in any way. Therefore, his anger was that of a righteous nature. Produce fruit in keeping with repentance. Fruit is referred to a lot in the New testament. We are to have the fruits of the Spirit which would also be the fruit produced in keeping with repentance. Love, joy, peace, goodness, faithfulness, kindness, self control. If the fruit we produce is not of the Spirit then we do not have the Spirit within us. We are told to examine ourselves to see if we are in the faith. We must ask ourselves what our fruit is and if we are in danger of being cut down and thrown into the fire!

When I look at my own fruit, I know there is so much room for growth in all of these areas. In many of them I still feel like I am just a baby. I have been pruned on so many occassions and it can be so painful but yet I am so thankful. He has not given up on me. He knows my heart. He knows my strengths as well as my weaknesses and each day He lifts me up with new mercies and a fresh abundance of His grace.

Let us not have the motives, the hearts, of the Phraisees and the Sadducees whom are referred to as a "brood of vipers"! Let our motives and our hearts be led by the Holy Spirit! We are known by the fruit we bear. A good tree cannot produce bad fruit and neither can a bad tree produce good fruit.

Running after people for Christ...

2008-02-26T14:34:00.002-07:00

Today was the big day. I had gotten up the nerve to ask the woman I mentioned in a previous post to get together with me for an informal Bible study and prayer time a few times a week. I called her and we were to meet at a particular store. Well, we got our wires crossed and ended up at different stores. I put all three kids in the car and headed down to a different one which I was sure she had went to instead. After getting there, we realized that she was not there and figured she had indeed went to the first store. We got in the car again and she was not there either. Now, if you knew me you would know that by this time I was in tears. All I had wanted to do was to follow what God had laid upon my heart and it was not going as I had expected at all. An hour after we had left the house (the store was just a few blocks, mind you) we finally met up with each other. I was able to invite her as I had wanted to and she was eager to accept. I just hope the next time we get together it isn't quite so much of a hassle, but if it is - I will follow what He is leading me to do...even if that means running all over town trying to reach out to someone.

Proverbs 5:22-23

2008-02-25T20:40:00.002-07:00

The evil deeds of a wicked man ensnare him; the cords of his sin hold him fast. He will die for lack of discipline, led astray by his own folly.

I wasn't at all shocked by the first part of this and admittedly had no problem setting them aside because surely I am not considered "wicked". It was the second part of this that struck me. He will die for lack of discipline. In a previous post today I admitted my problem with sticking with something even if it was working. I'm guessing that is why this struck me as it did. Could that lack of discipline in my life truly lead me astray and cause me death? It is, of course, lack of discipline that allows me to fall into sin as much as I do. It is that same lack of discipline that has me conquering the same things over and over again and then once again letting them overtake me. Consistency is so hard to maintain yet it is vital and speaks volumes as to our own self-discipline. This is something I am becoming increasingly aware of especially as my children grow. Oh, how I pray I am able to conquer this particular issue through the grace and the mercy and the power of God!

Getting it together

2008-02-25T11:15:00.002-07:00

I have really slacked off on the area of housecleaning since our third baby came along four months ago. Actually, I think I slacked off when I learned I was pregnant with her! After some encouragement from my husband (what an awesome guy, wanting to do anything he can to help out!) I see we (we, meaning me) need to get it together in this area. When my son was one I had went to a system of having a check list of things to do on specific days of the week just to stay on top of things. It always makes me feel like I've accomplished something when I can check it off. I have decided to go back to this system. The kids are going to help out (hopefully) and they get to put stickers on the ones that we have done for the day. Yesterday went well. I hope I can keep it up. I have trouble sticking with something even if it is yeilding great results. I don't know why, really, I guess I think once I have it under control I don't need to continue doing what got it under control in the first place. It is definitely something I need to work on.

Stepping Out

2008-02-25T11:09:00.002-07:00

I think I have mentioned it before, but I am an introvert. I am very comfortable spending time at home with my family. I am not so comfortable with people that I do not know very well. I have been given the opportunity to help out a mother from my MOPS group. I ventured to do so last Friday for the first time. I was quite nervous to say the least. All in all, it went pretty well, and we even took the kids to the park together. After spending much time in prayer while pedaling away on the bicycle at the gym I have come to the somewhat obvious conclusion that God is asking me to step out of my comfort zone in order to come alongside this woman. I have decided to ask her to join me for informal Bible study and prayer time on a regular basis. This is very new to me as the first time I had really spoken to her was on Friday and it was rather awkward. I just pray that the Holy Spirit guides us and that He will be glorified in this. Please pray for us!

Proverbs 10:8-9

2008-02-21T12:40:00.002-07:00

The wise in heart accept commands, but a chattering fool comes to ruin.
The man of integrity walks securely, but he who takes crooked paths will be found out.

The first part of this couldn't help but make me think of my children. When they accept my commands and do as I say (usually in order to keep them safe) they are much better off than when they try to argue with me or try to tell me why it is okay to do what they want to do. We do that too, don't we? When we accept what God says we are so much better off than when we try to plead with Him as to why our way is better. It truly is the wiser thing to just listen. When we know the person in authority (God) is perfect, why do we argue?

If we desire a path that is secure, a path that is safe, we will listen to Him. It may not be the easiest path nor may it be the quickest but it is secure. If we desire something else, something of this world, the quick fix, it may seem like things are going well but in the end it will all come crashing down.

It is amazing to me, how the Bible really is the Living Word of a Living God! It speaks new things to me every time I gaze upon its print.

Homeschooling: my heart's desire

2008-02-21T12:20:00.002-07:00

As I said in my previous post, my son is about to turn five. This means that he is ready for Kindergarten next fall. I have been teaching him at home for the past year and a half. It has went fairly well and he has progressed much faster than I could have ever imagined. He has the typical mornings where he thinks something is too hard for him just because he doesn't really want to do it, or just plain resisting me on the entire process. Ever since he was a baby there has been this desire in my heart to teach him at home. I think I went to Mardel's and bought the first "workbook" (first grade math) when he was less than a year old!

I love to know what he is struggling with, what he is excelling in, what he is interested in. I love to see it finally click for him and know that he has "gotten" it. It is great for me to be able to have him ask me a question about space or sea turtles or dinosaurs and be able to completely detour in that direction because I know he is interested in it. I dream of taking them on field trips to experience what they are learning so that they will remember it forever. I want to instill in them a love for learning rather than dreading to do it because it isn't something they enjoy or it isn't done in a way that they can full grasp the subject.

With all that said, it still has been a difficult decision to keep him out of Kindergarten next year. There are times when I wonder if I really am his best teacher. When he is resisting me I wonder if it isn't because I am his mom and he'd do better in a school setting. But in my heart, I know that this desire is not from me. It is something that has been put there by God. It most definitely has not always been easy and will probably get harder at times but it is also very rewarding. I do not have any problem with those who send their children to school. I know God does not put this on every mother's heart and it is no less noble a task to mother a child and send them to school than it is to school them at home.

My main reason for putting this here is because I know there is a voice of doubt. The voice that says maybe they would be better off with someone else, the voice that tries to drown out a true desire that has been put there by God. I need to remind myself of that as well. If we choose to send our children to school let it be for something other than that. We are capable, we are equipped, we can do it and if God has put that in our hearts than we should act on that.

Birthday Parties

2008-02-21T12:05:00.002-07:00

My son is about to turn 5. He went to his first real birthday party (read: without mom staying the entire time) in December. He told everyone about this party and slept with the little "goodie bag" that was given to him. He has also been begging me to let him have a similar party. I told him he could invite four friends and we would indeed have a party. The invitations have all been given/sent so I cannot go back on it now.

I am not a party person. I do not know how my own mother did it all those years when we insisted on inviting every single girl or boy in the class. I distinctly remember one year when I invited all the girls and I spent a good majority of the time crying on our basement steps while the rest of the girls had fun and somehow managed to also knock over the Christmas tree. My mother never turned me down though. I'm not sure this was always a good thing but I know she had the best of intentions. I am not looking forward to my kids having an expectation of a birthday party every year and I am terrified that they will constantly want bigger and better and say "so and so's" party was better than this one. I am trying to teach them to be thankful and not have those attitudes but realisticly I know that their little hearts will more than likely feel all of those things to some extent.

We will be having a Clifford party with many of the activities and games printed off of http://www.pbsparents.org . I plan on making my very first ice cream cake and I haven't a clue what we will do for decorations. This whole idea of everyone getting their own little bag of things is pretty foreign to me. I guess I'll be making a trip or two to the dollar store!

This party isn't for another three weeks and I'm pretty sure I will be stressing out over it every single day until it is over. I don't know if it is an introvert thing or what, but I honestly don't know if I'll ever feel comfortable doing this kind of thing!

Psalm 34:1-5

2008-02-15T08:49:00.002-07:00

I will extol the LORD at all times;
his praise will always be on my lips.
My soul will boast in the LORD;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice
Glorify the LORD with me;
let us exalt his name together.

I sought the LORD, and he answered me;
he delivered me from all my fears.
Those who look to him are radiant;
their faces are never covered with shame.

I know it may seem I went backwards from my post yesterday but I want to write yesterday's first simply because of the importance it showed in controlling the tongue. This starts off with how we shall extol the LORD and that includes His praise constantly being on our lips. We cannot speak evil or have lies on our lips and claim to have His praise coming forth as well. Of course in the next line we see it goes even deeper than that! Our entire soul must boast of His greatness. It's as though there is such a pure joy within our souls that the mere appearance of it will boast of His mighty power and holiness. These two things most definitely glorify his name and that is the greatest goal there is - to constantly glorify Him and exalt His name!

When we concentrate on our fears and discouragements and insecurities it is often quite obvious what is going on within our hearts and our souls. We are downcast and preoccupied. We are hardly going to be considered radiant. But when we look to Him, the One and Only, the All in All, the King of Kings it is then that we are delivered from all these things. It is in the light of His holiness, His love, His grace, His mercies, His mighty power that we never have the need for shame, nor discouragement, nor despair. It is in the light of all that He is that we truly become radiant. Oh, that we would not lean upon our own understanding but rather seek Him. Surely He will answer.

I will be trying to do one of these a day, as I am going to be meditating upon them throughout the day. Yesterday was a much better day as I chewed on the reality of the verses I posted. I hope you will do the same.

Psalm 34:11-14

2008-02-14T19:33:00.002-07:00

Come, my children, listen to me,
I will teach you the fear of the LORD.
Whoever of you loves life
and desires to see many good days,
keep your tongue from evil
and your lips from speaking lies.
Turn from evil and do good;
seek peace and pursue it.

Oh, how important it is to have the fear of the LORD. Some people think this is ridiculous. Some say that He is supposed to be your best friend and fear should not be a part of the relationship. However, it rings true that fear of the LORD is truly the beginning of all wisdom. It is wisdom that I seek, it is His wisdom that I desire rather than the world's and so I know that this is true. Considering this, it is quite appropriate that it is followed up by then next verse. If we desire to see many good days (and, really, who doesn't?) we will keep our tongue from evil and our lips from speaking lies. How quickly our tongue can give away whether we are in fact wise or foolish. Reading this made me realize that I have to stop initiating unnecessary and harmful conversations. When I say unnecessary, I mean in a spiritual sense. Some things are quite necessary in order to stand firm in what we believe! I know I must stay focused on His will and only doing good for the Kingdom. I cannot seek the world's peace but rather to actively pursue His peace.

I pray that I can write these verses upon my heart as I continue to meditate upon them and I think every Christian could benefit from doing so.

Journaling

2008-02-13T17:24:00.002-07:00

I was going through some things yesterday and today and found stacks and stacks of various journals I have kept over the past seven years. I used to journal all the time. I am quite sure that anyone reading through those particular journals early on would be able to tell pretty much every thought I had during the day/week. I was very thorough and it was incredibly theraputic for me to write it all down. After my son was born I journaled a lot less but still continued to do it. After my daughter it really slowed down. I don't think I've written a word in a journal since 2006! I am going to start doing this again. It is very good for me to do it and I look forward to my kids being able to read them some day and see what I struggled with, what encouraged me, what was happening, etc. Hopefully they will have that desire to know me and I pray that it will in turn encourage them in their own struggles that they are surely going to encounter. I was rather shocked at the amount of journals my thoughts have filled and it may be more practical now a days to just type them out but there is something about putting pen to paper and having it be between me and God that makes it much different for me.

My Valentine

2008-02-13T17:16:00.003-07:00

I know I said I think this holiday is unnecessary, however I would like to take this time to express how thankful I am for the incredible man that asked me to marry him. Though he is currently sick and in pain he never ceases to amaze me. He is far more than I ever could have imagined and after nearly six years of marriage I find myself only loving him more daily. Of course, my other valentine is sweet and quite the looker as well. He is, afterall, a spittin image of my husband. I'm quite thankful to have this wonderful man and intelligent boy in my life.

Hope you have a great day, loving and being loved.

Get Moving

2008-02-13T11:15:00.002-07:00

We had a gym open up across the street from us recently. I haven't been to a gym regularly in the last five years! When I went before, it was always with my husband and that made it fun and quite enjoyable. When it came to me having to leave my treasured family and drive across town to get to the gym all by myself I just didn't have the motivation to do it. It seemed like more of a chore to me. Well, before this gym opened I was so excited to be able to just walk there and only go for twenty minutes if I wanted to. I have been getting up every morning at about 6:00 and going to the gym from 6:30 until 7:00. This has put such a different spin on each day. It gives me a quiet time to start the day and it gets me moving. My mood is so much better and I feel like a better mom on the days that I go. I haven't went in the last few days because my daughter has been sick which means she has been whiney and I don't want to have her throwing a tantrum when I leave. Sometimes I am able to get out before they even wake up, but I didn't want to take the chance. I plan on returning tomorrow morning. It just makes such a difference to get moving every morning even if I do have to drag myself out of bed to do it. I am so happy I am there once I get there!

Frugally jumping into Cloth Diapering

2008-02-13T11:01:00.002-07:00

The price of diapers is outrageous these days. If you buy one of those "jumbo" packs at the store they are easily ten dollars or more. We have went the Sam's club route for the last four years but even that at 30.00 a box sure adds up. I wanted to do cloth with my first and also with my second but we were in a drought and I allowed that to deter me. This time I decided to go for it. I had my mom sew up five fleece diaper covers and I was give a dozen prefold diapers when my son was born. The person who gave them to me had intended them to be burp cloths, but I never used them as such. I had also bought two all in one diapers off of ebay for about eight dollars each when my daughter was small. Some people say you need to spend three hundred dollars to start doing cloth. We do cloth during the day and disposables at night. So, instead of going through forty two diapers in a week we go through seven. I save the all in ones for when we are going out to the store or someplace because I know that they can handle three hours out on the town whereas the prefolds aren't quite so practical for that. The fleece diaper covers are working out well for around the house. I let her go in just the diaper because if it is compressed it tends to wick onto clothing.

I just wanted to do this post because when I was researching it I was quickly discouraged by the cost. It seemed easier and, in the short term, cheaper to just be in disposables. We were able to start up for less than a box of diapers at Sam's. We spent 16.00 on the all in ones, about 6.00 on the materials for the diaper covers, and the prefolds were a gift (they usually run about 12.00 at Walmart or Target). Granted, these only last me a day and a half so I have to do a quick load of wash each night but since I am able to set it on Extra Small load and only use a very small amount of detergent (probably a tablespoon) that doesn't add up to be very much.

Our Fallen Heroes

2008-02-13T10:52:00.002-07:00

A few days ago I received a comment on something I had posted in July of 2007 about Travis W. Anderson. You can read it here. I posted it as part of the Some Gave All Tribute. There is a button located in the sidebar. I was very touched to recieve a comment from someone who actually knew this young man. I hope that you will go and read what she has to say and remember the people who are risking their lives on a daily basis and the people that are left to grieve when they do not return home.

The Bottom of the Bottle

2008-02-10T19:57:00.000-07:00

When I was a senior in high school I opted to take all the advanced courses I could. One of these included Honors English. We were asked to write an article that would be published in our local paper. I just came across this article again today and thought I would put it here. It definitely was not popular among my classmates and parts of it were required (length, statistics, quotes, etc.).

The Bottom of the Bottle

"Don't wait up for me, Mom. I'm just going out with the guys"
"I'm not too drunk, Dad. I've just had a couple."

Phrases like these should strike fear into the hearts of most parents. As parents, they have a responsibility to prevent their children from endangering themselves and others. While teenagers think their lives are their own and should be of no concern to parents, this way of thinking is unrealistic. When teenagers decide to pour alcohol down their throats, they are being irresponsible and dangerous.

Numerous surveys have stated that in the small community of Oakes, alcohol is the drug of choice. The legality of this drug has made it easy to obtain and as a result, its use is increasingly more common among the youth. Drinking has evolved to the point that it has become a common part of being a teenager. Society no longer condemns the town drunk but rather accepts drinking as experiemental behavior. The problem is that many are not just experimenting; it has evolved into a way of life. There is a fine line between you controlling the alcohol and the alcohol controlling you. Unfortunately, alcohol impairs a person's judgement to a point where they do not know when they have crossed that line.

I will be attending college next fall, as well as many of my classmates, and I am fully aware of the behavior associated with typical college life: no parents, no rules, no curfews, the perfect party scene, and for many, little time spent actually studying. We have all heard of the "freshmen 15", those pounds put on because of the change in lifestyle, and to some, it seems like a big deal. Most assuredly, those few extra pounds will be the least of their worries if alochol becomes their way of life.

Alcohol causes many problems in the home, it is not just a concern when it comes to the road. According to the Director of Development for Northwest College of the Bible, Charles Dailey, one teenager in five is said to be a drinker and of those, ten percent are future alcoholics. Dailey also says that one in four families is affected by alcohol in some way. The emotional impact of living with a person who drinks is much like living with a time bomb. It is almost impossible to tell what will happen or when. We are fooling ourselves if we think the only people we hurt when we drink are ourselves. Many people get hurt, especially family members.

I'm not saying that everyone who has a beer on Friday night becomes a problem drinker, but a great number of people cannot control the progression of a tolerance to the liquid. I believe the problem of alchol exists within our community and every other community in this nation, and most likely throughout the world. It is a sad fact that Americans consume 4 3/4 billion gallons of beer annually, and still only ranks 20th in alcohol consumption. It seems we are doing very little to nothing to confront this problem, though. We throw the drunk drivers and abusers in jail for a night, and put them back into society with little help, until something horrible happens.

Violence, drugs, sexually transmitted diseases, jail, and death all accompany the temporary buzzed feeling. I strongly urge parents to take the initiaitive to find out exactly what their children are doing when they go out for a night on the town. Lives are literally atstake; it may be your child or some innocent person getting hit by an intoxicated driver. I would hope that the next time you decide to go drinking, that you carefully consider the possible consequences, and remember, the answers to life aren't going to be found at the bottom of the bottle.

Mommy, please play with us!

2008-02-09T15:10:00.000-07:00

My four year old son is definitely a quality time child. He is constantly requesting that I play with them. This consists of sitting on the floor playing with whatever "guy" they pick for me. I must talk in an unnatural voice and help whoever needs me and be a guest at Winnie the Pooh's birthday party which is always in my daughter's imaginary world. I could sit there and play for hours and they would still beg me to sit with them a bit longer. I know it is the times that I sit with them playing their games that they will remember when they get older. It is not whether the house was completely clean or not. I try to make a point to sit and play with them at least once or twice during the day and interact with them no matter what I am doing. I am getting better at including them in everything I do as they get older even though it may not get done as fast nor as well as if I just did it by myself.

The High Calling of being a wife

2008-02-08T11:26:00.001-07:00

It is so easy at times to get wrapped up in the children. They take up much of our time and definitely have needs that are urgent to be tended to. It often slips our mind of what life was like before these precious little lives came into the world. Before the incredible blessing of children was a marriage between two people that loved each other enough to say "I do" until death. Children are wonderful and motherhood is definitely a priority but we cannot let that hinder the relationship of husband and wife. There are so many things that we, as wives, can be and need to be for our husbands.

The first step is being thankful. When I stop and think about everything my husband does for me on a daily basis, I am overwhelmed at the love he has for us as a family, and for me as his wife. He knew that I had a desire to be a stay at home mom and he never once has pushed me to be anything other than that. He has made sacrifices and never complains about the fact that I do not work. He works so hard every day and when he comes home he leaves it all behind just so he can focus on us. Sometimes this frustrates me because I want to know when he is stressed or what is going on at work, but I know that he does it out of his love for us. I watch him and I am in awe of the awesome, godly man He has given me for a husband.

The second step is to be realistic. Things are not always going to go the way we want them to. Sometimes I get things in my head and I dwell on them so much that when things fall short of my unrealistic expectation I am devastated. I do not hide this well at all. My husband deserves a wife who can be flexible and have fun even when the situation isn't perfect. He also deserves a wife who will call upon the Lord instead of leaning on her own understanding. I am guilty of not being those things but I am striving to become what I know God wants me to be as his wife.

The third step is to be understanding. I am also guilty of crying and saying I want my husband to be understanding. Most men have a totally different way of doing this. They won't say, honey we need to talk, and then have a one sided conversation filled with tears and poor me's. I am coming to the realization that I need to do away with this type of thing completely. He doesn't need that and truth be known, I don't really need to do it either. Nine times out of ten, and sometimes ten times out of ten, I am just making a huge deal out of something that is only in my head! If I want to be a good wife I need to understand what he needs from me. He needs support, love, and encouragement. To give him these things I need to make sure I am doing things with the right motive and put God first. It is so much easier to be a good wife when I am seeking God.

Valentine's Day is coming up. I, personally, think it is an unecessary holiday. However, we should make a point to remember to show our husbands just how much they mean to us and how much we love them every single day. If something is keeping you from completely loving your husband and showing him that love seek God on how you can overcome it and glorify Him in your marriage.

Thoughts on Motherhood

2008-02-06T20:31:00.000-07:00

We were blessed with the birth of our third child in late October. Before she was born I felt rather exhausted trying to take care of our other two children and being a wife as well as growing this incredible new life inside of me. Since she has arrived I have fell absolutely in love with the role God has put me in once again. I love being a mom. That is the only job description I ever desire to have. I do not long to go to college and get my degree. I do not dream about what it will be like when my kids go off to kindergarten. I am not rushing them along to the age where I might be able to get some me time again. To tell you the truth, even though there are times when I'd like a little more space between me and them, I always want to be with them. I love my family and I treasure every single moment that we have together. The only thing I do desire is to have that quiet time that is absolutely vital to a healthy spiritual life. It is hard to find stillness in the midst of a three month old, a two and a half year old, and an almost five year old constantly needing you for something. I know it is a task that I am called to and I allow my thoughts and my prayers to be briefly interrupted to focus on what they are saying, doing, wanting, or needing.

My intention is for this blog to become a source of encouragement for mothers and of course I want it to continue to be of spiritual encouragment for anyone who happens to find their way here.

I am back!

2008-02-04T10:16:00.000-07:00

I can't believe how long it has been since I last posted! I have a lot of things I want to post about so I hope you will check back soon and see what I mean.

It's been a while!

2007-03-07T18:03:00.000-07:00

I don't know if anyone still visits here, but I am hoping to start posting every once in a while again. Life has been busy with the 2 little ones and we just recently found out we are expecting again! God is so wonderful and we are incredibly excited to meet this new addition. Of course, since I started this now both my little ones are in tears so I will have to write later.

Not Today...

2006-08-03T14:43:00.000-07:00

I was speaking with someone today and they asked for my opinion. This person says she is a Christian. The situation we spoke of was this: A person had went to a job fair, clearly marked on an application that he had been convicted of a felony and he was hired for the job as a temp. After being hired they had forms that needed to be filled out and signed. On one of the aforementioned forms there was a question on if they had been convicted of any felony in the last four years (which he had) and it went on to mention any violent crime and that they would not be able to be hired if they had. He thought it was speaking of only violent felonies and marked that he had not. The question she asked me was, should he call and explain the situation and ask if that disqualifies him for the job. I clearly thought the answer was obvious and said that he should. However, this was not the response the person was looking for. She felt if it would jeopordize his chance at the job in any way he should hold off on telling them until he could 'get his foot in the door' and hopefully change the mind of the company regarding this policy. This totally shocked me. The aforementioned person also has an active warrant out for his arrest in a different state which cannot be acted upon unless he goes back to the tri-state region so he is in effect, running from the law. The point of me putting this here is that I made the comment that she didn't seem to want to hear what the right thing was...to which she responded - not today I don't.

Oh, how sad this is to me!

My Biggest Weakness...

2006-07-25T20:12:00.000-07:00

has always been finding balance. I'm sure I've mentioned that more than a few times in this blog, but it is something I struggle with constantly. God is surely showing me much grace in this area, and I am slowly learning what it is that He wants of me. Though I find it hard to set aside time to cook and clean and go to the store instead of playing and giving my undivided attention to my children, I know that I must. It is just as important for them to see me being a wife to their daddy as it is for them to see me as someone who loves and cares for them. Of course, everything I do is done not for the sake of wanting acknowledgment but simply because of what has been shown to me and how I long to serve those around me. With this new look on things, it is becoming clearer and easier to do what the Holy Spirit has been prompting me to do for quite some time. Now if only I could actually cook more than a handful of things...it is not the prime time to learn a new trade when watching after two very young children! Though my menu might be limited for a while I am glad that my husband appreciates this attempt to offer him a clean house(minus the toys that are inevitably strewn about in the few minutes before he walks through the door) and a home-cooked meal when he walks in the door. Oh, how I have wanted this home to be a refuge for him, a safe place away from the rest of the world! May it become just that, through God's truly amazing grace.

Moving in Faith

2006-07-24T10:55:00.000-07:00

Over the past few months I have made it my utmost priority to be in study of God's Word. Through this, I am being moved in faith by knowledge of Christ. This overwhelms me as I know how inadequate mere word are, especially my own. I am brought to my knees knowing that I must completely submit to the calling of Christ to give up the position of rest we have been given and follow after Him in becoming a servant to others. Grace must be the driving factor in every thing I do. I cannot do it for any selfish reason but only because of the grace that has been shown to me and how I do not deserve any of it. Oh, to be able to call on the name of the Lord, what a privlege it is!

2006-07-18T16:15:00.000-07:00

Today I received word that my uncle, my mom's brother, was found dead in his apartment. They think he had been dead since Friday. It appears that many years of smoking, emphysema, and being overweight are what took his life. What makes this so difficult is knowing how close my mom was to her brother and not being able to be there for her, and the fact that his two daughters and his two grandchildren will have no more time to know him. Last I knew, he was not a Christian, which makes this perhaps the most difficult death I have ever dealt with. In any case, it has made me put things back into perspective as I tend to get caught up in the little things at times. This came as a shock to our entire family and it makes me all the more aware that no one is promised tomorrow. Hold your children close, and truly do not worry about tomorrow but live as though today is your very last.

Some Gave All Tribute

2006-07-17T10:13:00.000-07:00

On May 13, 2005 our daughter entered this world. On that same day a 28 year old was giving his life for this country. His name was Travis W. Anderson. He had a difficult time in school and found himself in trouble on more than one occassion. Shortly before he left for Iraq he told his sister that he was tired of being a "screw-up" and wanted to do the right thing. He was killed when a car filled with explosives slipped past a checkpoint in Beiji, Iraq. Though I know nothing of his spiritual well being I pray that he became a Christian before dying. Whether he did or not, though, I thank him for giving his life for this country and for giving our daughter a better life because of the sacrifice that was made.

Is Christ your Savior...or your Helper?

2006-07-17T09:47:00.000-07:00

In church yesterday something hit me that hadn't before. I am guilty of frequently asking God to "help" me with things. I ask Him to "help" me do the right thing, to "help" me grow in my faith, etc. Without meaning to, I know realize, that I was implying that I have some part in doing these things. In reality, I have no part in them. Christ is not my helper, He is my Savior. I know I must be completely consumed by Him to do anything good or anything with a pure heart. If any of me is involved, even minimally, it is undoubtedly tainted by sin. Oh, how hard it is to completely change my view and not give into my first instinct of asking Him to "help" me. I must completely and totally submit to the power of the Holy Spirit in order to have the holiness and pureness that He desires in me. I know many people do this, and probably unknowingly, but once your eyes are opened you are accountable to what you have attained. Let there be no looking back, true repentance, and no pleading of ignorance.

This is my way, and that is your way...

2006-07-17T09:36:00.000-07:00

Something my son said this morning shocked me. He learned how to cut using scissors yesterday and has been obsessed with cutting up paper ever since. He was holding the scissors with his thumb and one finger, making it impossible to close the scissors without pushing them closed with his opposite hand. I tried to show him to use his thumb and two fingers and then he would be able to close them without risking the possibility of him cutting his hand. He then told me, "No mommy, this is my way and that is your way. It's okay for me to have my own way and you to have your own way." Now, this may seem like no big deal, but to me it spoke volumes as to what he is learning even in the few television shows I allow him to watch (that is the only way I am able to take a shower). From such an early age they are taught that there are many different ways to do things and that is okay. There are alternatives to many things, but there are far more where there is a right way and a wrong way and for him, at three, to be defying that fact is scary to me. He was adamant that his way was not wrong and that he could continue to do it that way, he did not care that I have much more experience in this area than he does and that I was telling him the correct way so that he would not harm himself. Afterall, he was doing it "his own way" and that was "okay". After much struggle with the child, he gave in and admitted that the right way was much better and has been doing it that way ever since. It takes such strength as a parent to be consistent and stick with it on little things like this, which may seem like they have no bearing on anything, but be encouraged that what you do in the little things has a huge impact on who your child will become and whom he/she will follow (God or the world).

Memorization

2006-06-01T13:39:00.000-07:00

It is becoming increasingly clear to me how vital it is to have God's word etched in your heart and your mind. Memorization is key here so that we can recall these verses at any given moment and it will hopefully lead us back into wisdom of doing what is right rather than falling into temptation. I have started working on this with our three year old, not really sure what to expect. He is doing great and has already memorized Ephesians 6:1, Psalm 116:1 and Acts 4:12. I have tried to explain to him in his terms what each one means and though he might not grasp them entirely it amazes me to think that he is already knowing the word of God better than I did up until several years ago! The other day we were drawing on his chalkboard, and I drew the three crosses and was telling him that the other two men who were crucified with Jesus had sinned but that Jesus had never sinned and he said to me, " but Jesus prayed to God that if He could to take His cross off of Him" He must have been told this in Sunday school because I had never went over that with him. It just amazed me that he remembered this and put it in the right context from just hearing it once in a Bible story at church! Oh how we should lead these little ones unto Him!

Hebrews 1 - 2:10

2006-06-01T13:32:00.000-07:00

The Son Superior to Angels
1In the past God spoke to our forefathers through the prophets at many times and in various ways, 2but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom he made the universe. 3The Son is the radiance of God's glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word. After he had provided purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty in heaven. 4So he became as much superior to the angels as the name he has inherited is superior to theirs.
5For to which of the angels did God ever say,
"You are my Son;
today I have become your Father[a]"[b]?
Or again,
"I will be his Father,
and he will be my Son"[c]?
6And again, when God brings his firstborn into the world, he says,
"Let all God's angels worship him."[d]
7In speaking of the angels he says,
"He makes his angels winds,
his servants flames of fire."[e]
8But about the Son he says,
"Your throne, O God, will last for ever and ever,
and righteousness will be the scepter of your kingdom.
9You have loved righteousness and hated wickedness;
therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions
by anointing you with the oil of joy."[f] 10He also says,
"In the beginning, O Lord, you laid the foundations of the earth,
and the heavens are the work of your hands.
11They will perish, but you remain;
they will all wear out like a garment.
12You will roll them up like a robe;
like a garment they will be changed.
But you remain the same,
and your years will never end."[g]
13To which of the angels did God ever say,
"Sit at my right hand until I make your enemies
a footstool for your feet"[h]?
14Are not all angels ministering spirits sent to serve those who will inherit salvation?
Hebrews 2
Warning to Pay Attention 1We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away. 2For if the message spoken by angels was binding, and every violation and disobedience received its just punishment, 3how shall we escape if we ignore such a great salvation? This salvation, which was first announced by the Lord, was confirmed to us by those who heard him. 4God also testified to it by signs, wonders and various miracles, and gifts of the Holy Spirit distributed according to his will.
Jesus Made Like His Brothers 5It is not to angels that he has subjected the world to come, about which we are speaking. 6But there is a place where someone has testified:
"What is man that you are mindful of him,
the son of man that you care for him?
7You made him a little[i] lower than the angels;
you crowned him with glory and honor
8and put everything under his feet?[j]
In putting everything under him, God left nothing that is not subject to him. Yet at present we do not see everything subject to him. 9But we see Jesus, who was made a little lower than the angels, now crowned with glory and honor because he suffered death, so that by the grace of God he might taste death for everyone.
10In bringing many sons to glory, it was fitting that God, for whom and through whom everything exists, should make the author of their salvation perfect through suffering.

I have never understood some people's obsession with angels. Reading this, I am even more baffled at how an angel gets such elevated to such a high status by so many people. How much more than should Christ be elevated, yet sadly it would seem that He is not elevated at all by many.

How do you explain...?

2006-05-30T11:36:00.000-07:00

We had a beautiful weekend together. We were able to take our three year old son to fly his first kite, to play his first game of miniature golf, and to the zoo.

We also took flowers to their grandpa's grave. Our one year old daughter is much too young to even have to explain this to, but our newly turned three year old is another story. Just how do you explain such a complicated concept to a young child? His grandpa died one week before he was born, so he only knows him as his papa in heaven. We decided to tell him exactly how it was. We explained to him that this was where his papa's body was buried but that his spirit was alive in heaven with God and Jesus. We explained that when people die they bury their bodies in a box under the ground and then cover it up again. We explained that some day when Jesus comes back that those same bodies will rise up out of the ground and our spirit and our body will be together again. Surely, no one will dare to accuse us of watering things down for him because of his age. The reason we explain things in this manner, which he seemed to grasp far better than I had expected by the way, is because I do not under any circumstances want him to come to me when he is five or six with questions about these things and have him ask me why I had told him something different when he was younger. I feel I would be discrediting the Gospel if I tell him something I feel he will be able to understand and then have to change it and/or add onto it later. I admit the questions of , what body? what ground? died? etc. can get a little tedious of answering after the fourth or fifth time of each one being asked, but it is important not to brush these questions aside because children are most definitely learning from these questions and the answers given to them. He understands far more than I did at his age. Of course, my parents were not Christians and did not approach things in this way. On the drive there I questioned if we should tell him everything, but as we arrived I knew that was the right thing to do.

It seems too many people are scared to use this approach with children, and even with adults. They want to water it down so that the hearer is able to comprehend it, to understand it, when the truth is we will never comprehend all that God is, we will never understand in full the mystery of Christ and His sacrifice for us. It is something that requires faith. We are not doing God any favors by not telling our children or the people we come into contact with the full Gospel. We are not helping them by keeping them comfortable either. We are in fact contributing to the many false converts who profess to be Christians but have no roots.

Matthew 18:7-14

2006-05-16T11:20:00.000-07:00

How terrible it will be for anyone who causes others to sin. Temptation to do wrong is inevitable, but how terrible it will be for the one who does the tempting. So if your hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better to enter heaven crippled or lame than to be thrown into the unquenchable fire with both of your hands and feet. And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better to enter heaven half blind than to have two eyes and enter hell.

Beware that you don't despise a single one of these little ones. For I tell you that in heaven their angels are always in the presence of my heavenly Father.

If a shepherd has one hundred sheep and one wanders away and is lose, what will he do? Won't he leave the ninety-nine others and go out into the hills to search for the lost one? And if he finds it, he will surely rejoice over it more than over the ninety-nine that didn't wander away! In the same way it is not my heavenly Father's will that even one of these little ones should perish.

Up until a few years ago I always thought the cut off your hand, eye, foot, etc. was only pertaining to me and my own life. Then I was brought to the realization that we are referred to as Christ's hands and feet and eyes and ears so this also applies to the body of Christ. So if one of us sins and is unrepentant it is in the best interest of the rest of the body to cut off that person since it is well known that sin corrupts the entire body especially the mind and the heart and cannot be allowed to remain a part of the body. We cannot embrace the one who tempts the rest of the body to sin, we cannot allow it to continue and put the rest of the body (especially the new members) in jeopardy.

It is a sad fact that some who claim to be in the body have used the verses about the shepherd and the sheep that has went astray to justify sinning and not only that but to say that sinning is good if it causes that much joy to God when we find our way back. I cannot understand how anyone who has the Holy Spirit in them can think this way. I do not know their hearts, but I do know that this is contrary to the things of God. Yes, God rejoices when we come back to Him, but to put sin in a glorifying light because He does is very wrong.

Mother's Day

2006-05-15T14:05:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a good day for us. We spent it together as a family. However, I feel kind of strange celebrating Mother's Day in the traditional sense. It seems weird to me that we would need to set aside an entire day to honor our mother's now that I am a mother. I feel honored in so many ways every single day by both my children and my husband. I don't want a day off from them. I don't want things made as easy as possible. I just want to be surrounded by my children and my husband and have them know just how much I love them and how much I care for them. My children give me things every day that make me know how special I am to them, their smiles, their pleas for help, yes even their clutching onto me for dear life (although I am not so good at handling this one at times) while screaming at the top of their lungs that they do not want to go to class but would rather stay with mommy and daddy. I just feel weird being the mother being honored I guess, because I feel like instead I should be thanking each one of them for making me a mother as this is the fulfillment of one of my heart's greatest desires!

Matthew 18:1-6

2006-05-15T13:39:00.000-07:00

About that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Which of us is greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?"

Jesus called a small child over to him and put the child among them. Then he said, "I assure you, unless you turn from your sins and become as little children you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. Therefore, anyone who becomes as humble as a little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven. And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me. But if anyone causes one of these little ones who trusts me to lose faith, it would be far better for that person to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around the neck.

The first thing that comes to mind when I read these verses is how hard it is to become again like a little child, so trusting, so humble - before pride was a stumbling block and being skeptical of everyone and everything was a given. Yet it is required of us to be humble, to trust Him completely and totally holding nothing back and giving freely a sacrifice of our very lives all based on faith! The second thing that hits me reading these verses is how welcoming a child and leading a child astray is so closely associated with welcoming the Lord and with bringing wrath from Him. Oh how important these little children are to Him! And to think that He has entrusted us with their care as parents, teachers, neighbors, and any other way we may directly or indirectly influence these little ones.

Should Christians Be Popular?

2006-05-05T11:26:00.000-07:00

The following "Question" was asked by a member of the congregation at Grace Community Church in Sun Valley, California, and "Answered" by their pastor, John MacArthur Jr. It was transcribed from the tape, GC 1301, titled "Bible Questions and Answers." A copy of the tape can be obtained by writing, Word of Grace, P.O. Box 4000, Panorama City, CA 91412 or by dialing toll free 1-800-55-GRACE.
Question
How can a Christian be popular with the world?
Answer
The answer is, by being a lousy Christian. There is no way that when you define your Christianity you can ever really in the truest sense be popular with the world.
I think that Christians who have a warm and loving spirit, who do good unto all man as the Bible says, not just to the household of faith; Christians whose lives are exemplary; Christians who meet the needs of those who are in need (like the good Samaritan); Christians who supply for those who have lack; Christians who are loving and kind and gentle will have a certain amount of popularity, they’ll have a certain amount of acceptance with the world. Those who are diligent, those who are faithful, those whose morals and ethics are above reproach will be respected by the world, but in terms of actually being accepted in the system, being a Christian eliminates that possibility.
“What fellowship hath light with darkness,” right? Paul wrote to the Corinthians, the sixth chapter in II Corinthians; he said there is no fellowship at that point. The more defined your Christian faith becomes, the less able you are to accommodate the world. And if you’re really bold and honest as a Christian, you’re going to find yourself having to confront the world with honest answers, with honest comments about the true problems in the world, and you’ll be very unpopular.

John 6:22-40

2006-05-05T10:27:00.000-07:00

Verses for today and yesterday:
The next morning, back across the lake, crowds began gathering on the shore, waiting to see Jesus. For they knew that he and his disciples had come over together and that the disciples had gone off in their boat, leaving him behind. Several boats from Tiberias landed near the place where the Lord had blessed the bread and the people had eaten. When the crowd saw that Jesus wasn't there, nor his disciples, they got into the boats and went across to Capernaum to look for him. When they arrived and found him, they asked "Teacher, how did you get here?"

Jesus replied, "The truth is, you want to be with me because I fed you, not because you saw the miraculous sign. But you shouldn't be so concerned about perishable things like food. Spend your energy seeking the eternal life that I, the Son of Man, can give you. For God the Father has sent me for that very purpose."

They replied, "What does God want us to do?"

Jesus told them, "This is what God wants you to do: Believe in the one he has sent."

They replied, "You must show us a miraculous sign if you want us to believe in you. What will you do for us? After all, our ancestors ate manna while they journeyed through the wilderness! As the Scriptures say, "Moses gave them bread from heaven to eat."

Jesus said, "I assure you, Moses didn't give them bread from heaven. My Father did. And now he offers you the true bread from heaven. The true bread of God is the one who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world."

"Sir," they said, "give us that bread every day of our lives."

Jesus replied, "I am the bread of life. No one who comes to me will ever be hungry again. Those who believe in me will never thirst. But you haven't believed in me even though you have seen me. However, those the Father has given me will comes to me and I will never reject them. For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do what I want. And this is the will of god, that I should not lose even one of all those he has given me, but that I should raise them to eternal life at the last day. For it is my Father's will that all who see his Son and believe in him should have eteranl life - that I should raise them at the last day."

Wow!

2006-05-03T13:22:00.000-07:00

Time goes by so fast! Our beautiful daughter will be turning one in ten days. Our son turned three just a month and a half ago and we will be celebrating our fourth anniversary next week! I have heard of many mothers and wives who are very worried about losing their identity as a woman when they become a mother or a wife. This is strange to me. In the past four years that I have went from being a single young woman to a wife and then also to a mother I have noticed something. My identity is being a Christian wife and mother. Afterall, I was created to be his help meet! This was the purpose for the creation of woman, so I don't know why I should desire an identity apart from my role as a wife. This is my job and I take it very seriously and I feel no loss of identity but rather I feel fulfilled in the roles that God has put me in. I find that when I grow as a wife and as a mother I also grow in my individual relationship with Christ. They are connected, as a man and a woman are joined together to be one. When we are wives and mothers striving to bring glory to God in our homes and putting His word in our hearts we are inevitably going to grow as women as well.

Psalm 34:15-22

2006-05-03T13:07:00.000-07:00

The eyes of the Lord watch over those who do right;
his ears are open to their cries for help.
But the Lord turns his face against those who do evil;
he will erase their memory from the earth.

The Lord hears his people when they call to him for help.
He rescues them from all their troubles.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted;
he rescues those who are crushed in spirit.

The righteous face many troubles,
but the Lord rescues him from each and every one.
For the Lord protects him from harm -
not one of his bones will be broken!

Calamity will surely overtake the wicked,
and thoe who hate the righteous will be punished.
But the Lord will redeem those who serve him.
Everyone who trusts in him will be freely pardoned.

The thing that sticks out most to me in the last two days with going over this particular Psalm is that God is faithful, that He will protect us and give us what we need but we need to seek Him out, we need to revere Him, we need to fear Him, we need to serve Him, we need to obey Him. If we do these things surely we will not lack "any good thing". However, this is according to what God knows we need and what God has in His perfect will, not necessarily what we want or what we think we need. We must trust in Him, call upon Him, and give Him our lives.

Psalm 34:1-14

2006-05-02T13:41:00.000-07:00

Today's verses:
Psalm 34:1-14
I will praise the Lord at all times.
I will constantly speak his praises.
I will boast only in the Lord;
let all who are discouraged take heart.
Come, let us tell of the Lord's greatness;
let us exalt his name together.

I prayed to the Lord and he answered me,
freeing me from all my fears.
Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy;
no shadow of shame will darken their faces.
I cried out to the Lord in my suffering, and he heard me
He set me free from all my fears.
For the angel of the Lord guards all who fear him,
and he rescues them.

Taste and see that the Lord is good.
Oh, the joys of those who trust in him!
Let the Lord's people show him reverance,
for those who honor him will have all they need.
Even strong young lions sometimes go hungry,
but those who trust the Lord will never lack any good thing.

Come, my children, and listen to me,
and I will teach you to fear the Lord.
Do any of you want to live
a life that is long and good?
Then watch your tongue!
Keep your lips from telling lies!
Turn away from evil and do good.
Work hard at living in peace with others.

The rest of this Psalm will be my meditation and study for tomorrow. I have to say the part that says "those who look to him will be radiant with joy" just calls out to me. This is just an awesome reminder to me to consciously praise Him in everything I do, in attitude, in heart, and in deed. Oh yes, let us exalt His name together! Let us as the church, as Christ's body make every effort to live every day praising Him and exalting Him and doing what is right!

Being Thankful...

2006-05-01T11:13:00.000-07:00

It can be hard at times to understand how you are glorfying God by doing loads of laundry, vacuuming the floor, playing games with your children, and on certain occasions it being a rarity to even leave the house. However, be assured that you are doing just that when you do it with the correct, godly attitude! When everything you do (yes even the day to day small stuff) is done with a joy and a determination to follow after Christ and to bring God the glory your children will see it, your husband will see it, and you will be changed daily to become thankful for your ability to stay at home and take care of the home. For years, I thought that things would get better for us once we were able to move into a bigger home (we are in a one bedroom at the present time). In the past I have become thankful for the place we have since it is definitely enough for us and it is far more than a lot of people have. However, in the past month I have had a drastic change of heart. I am no longer thankful for this place because of those reasons - I am truly absolutely thankful to God for this house and I am giving God the praise and the glory He deserves in providing it for us! I am now dreading moving to tell you the truth, if and when we do. I have come to cherish the closeness we have and the closeness it is fostering in our two young children. I have come to absolutely love the fact that there is little or no room for anger, resentment, selfishenss, in these small quarters. No one can go into a room and seclude themselves because they are upset with another member of the family. If we are here, we are here together and I love that. It has taught me so many things and I know it is teaching the rest of my family things as well, and now that I have come to be truly thankful for this place I cannot believe I went for so long wanting something different, something more, when God had the entire time provided exactly what we needed and still is and I am honored to stay at home with my children and take care of this place and now perhaps I can make this a refuge for us all the way it was meant to be. The attitude of the mother makes a huge difference in the attitude of her home. Now I long to do it all to God's glory and seek Him out and His will, instead of striving after my own!

2006-05-01T09:33:00.000-07:00

Verses for today:
1 Corinthians 15:1-11
Now let me remind you, dear brothers, of the Good News I preached to you before. You welcomed it then and still do now, for your faith is built on this wonderful message. And it is this Good News that saves you if you firmly believe it - unless, of course, you believed something that was never true in the first place.

I passed on to you what was most important and what had also been passed on to me - that Christ died for our sins, just as the Scriptures said. He was buried, and he was raised from the dead on the third day, as the Scriptures said. He was seen by Peter and then by the twelve apostles. After that, he was seen by more than five hundred of the brothers at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have died by now. Then he was seen by James and later by all the apostles. Last of all, I saw him, too, long after the others, as though i had been born at the wrong time. For I am the least of all the apostles, and I am not worthy to be called an apostle after the way I persecuted the church of God.

But whatever I am now, it is all because God poured out his special favor on me - and not without results. For I have worked harder than all the other apostles, yet it is not I, but God who was working through me by his grace. So it makes no difference whether I preach or they preach. The important this is that you believed what we preached to you.

2006-04-30T13:44:00.000-07:00

Galatians 1:6-12
I am shocked that you are turning away so soon from God, who in his love and mercy called you to share the eternal life he gives through Christ. You are already following a different way that pretends to be the Good News but is not the Good News at all. You are being fooled by those who twist and change the truth concerning Christ.

Let God's curse fall on anyone, including myself, who preaches any other message than the one we told you about. Even if an angel comes from heaven and preaches anyother message, let him be forever cursed. I will say it again: If anyone preaches any other gospel than the one you welcomed, let God's curse fall upon that person.

Obviously, I'm not trying to be a people pleaser! No, I am trying to please God. If I were still trying to please people, I would not be Christ's servant.

Dear brothers, I solemnly assure you that the Good News of salvation which I preach is not based on mere human reasoning or logic. For my message came by a direct revelation from Jesus Christ himself. No one else taught me.

It is clear to me that there are many different gospels being preached in our churches today. We have the health, wealth, and prosperity gospel. We have the legalistic gospel. We have the unverisalist gospel. We have the, you are loved the way you are, gospel. To be sure, the is a different gospel for each and every itching ear there is. There are many different gods that have been created in our image and many different ideas concerning Christ. The one thing in common with these is that they are trying to please men. They most definitely are not trying to please God and in most cases they face little or no opposition from the secular world. True Christianity though is another story. The true Gospel is being attacked constantly, the followers of this Gospel are being persecuted and are promised persecution. It is not something that was thought of from the mind of man, which explains why there are so many mysteries in the Bible that we could never come close to fully comprehending. There is however sufficient and plentiful amounts of evidence to support the Bible and its teachings, though those of the world will always think of it as foolishness.

We, as many of you probably do, are often on the receiving end of "Christian" forwards. These almost never preach the true gospel along with repentance and faith but rather have some picture with a faded out image of Christ or have a short story that is supposed to convey some Christian sentiment. At the end of many of these is the saying "If you are ashamed of me I will be ashamed of you before my Father" However this is not the true verse.
Mark 8:38
If anyone is ashamed of me and my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will be ashamed of him when he comes in his Father's glory with the holy angels."

However, the second part "and my words" gets cut off and the reason for this is surely that the words of Jesus are very often left out of such e-mails. This could be a feel good message for people of many faiths because there are many faiths that believe in Jesus or believe in some of the moral things that Christians do, however the Gospel is cut off and therefore sending such forwards is in fact not something to be proud of but rather something we should ask ourselves if we should be sending, especially to non-Christians.

What a little blessing!

2006-04-30T13:19:00.000-07:00

And in a big way! Yesterday we were taking a family walk with our three year old riding his tricycle along with us when we ran into a couple that my husband knows from work. It was such a blessing for us to see our three year old start talking to them by first speaking of the hill he had just rode down and then immediately going into "God loves us" and "God made everything" and that He loves everyone as well as "my great grandma is in Heaven and my other papa is in heaven too" and to follow it up with "When God takes us to Heaven then we'll be able to see Him!". To listen to the joy and wonder in his voice as he spoke of these things (with absolutely no prompting by the way) was such a blessing. It was a great encouragement as well. At times I feel I am talking over him because I refuse to talk down to him when he asks me questions about God and Jesus and the Bible. I do not want to make something up that I think he'll be able to understand and figure I can fix it later because when the time comes to fix it I would then have to explain why I didn't tell him the whole truth to begin with so I am determined to tell him the whole truth, and it seems he is grasping more than I was aware. Oh what a blessing it was to see him talk like that and so freely! I just had to share.

Finding Time

2006-04-28T09:22:00.000-07:00

In the day to day business of raising two children and keeping a home, I have found it is not easy to keep a quiet time or to devote all of yourself to reading and studying the Word as I would like to do. In seeking to find time God is showing me that I need to change the way in which I learn and instead of sitting for hours with concordance and notepad and taking notes and going through the Scriptures (which I have no time for anymore and when I do I am constantly interrupted) I must learn to find time to put His word into my heart every day. By understanding this I am just starting a new method of writing down passages on notecards and whenever I have a few moments to spare to meditate on those verses.
Here are today's:
Romans 8:15-22
So you should not be like cowering, fearful slaves. You should behave instead like God's very own children, adopted into his family - calling him "Abba, Father." For his Holy Spirit speaks to us deep in our hearts and tells us that we are God's children. And since we are his children, we will share his treasures - for everything God gives to his Son, Christ, is ours, too. But if we are to share his glory we must also share his suffering.
Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will give us later. For all creation is waiting eagerly for that future day when God will reveal who his children really are. Against its will, everything on earth was subjected to God's curse. All creation anticipates the day when it will join God's children in glorious freedom from death and decay. For we know that all creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.

There is definitely enough in those verses to keep me filled with gratitude, reflection, understanding, and prayer. Oh how thankful I am that when I cry out to Him, He hears me! Oh how thankful I am for the encouragement He gives! There is no excuse not to be in His word, there is always a way - and if we seek Him His will shall be made known to us.

I'm Back...

2006-04-27T13:08:00.000-07:00

Sort of. I would like to say that this time I am going to keep up with this, and although I intend to make more of an effort to post more often I am sure that life is going to do a pretty good job at preventing me from doing so (which is not a bad thing). God is doing great things, as always, and I am excited and passionate about the things He has put before me in which I have the opportunity to glorify Him and bring praise unto Him. Of course, this is the absolute priority in my life, to be a living sacrifice for the one who Created me and also gave Himself up for me. I have accepted a leadership position in our MOPS at church which I seek out your prayers that none of me and all of God is seen in this. I also have the opportunity to witness to someone who is quite "lukewarm" in their faith and I am a bit nervous in this but I know God can even use the stumbling words of someone like me to reach a receptive heart that is ready for true conversion so I know as long as I submit to the Holy Spirit His will shall be done.

End of a dry spell

2005-12-23T10:26:00.000-07:00

You are Lord of lords
and King of kings
You are God Almighty
You are everything we need

Prophecy and promise
have been fulfilled
faithfulness and providence
speak of your grace
as I fall to my knees
covering my face

Broken again
I know I haven't trusted
I've worried and pondered
what to do
instead of bringing it all
to you

You are Lord of lords
and King of kings
You are God Almighty
You are everything we need

You've raised the dead,
healed the sick
made the deaf hear
and the blind see
so why did I think
I was beyond your reach

Be still and know
you are God
Be not anxious
about anything
afterall you are
the Lord of lords
the King of kings
God Almighty
and everything
we need.

12/23/05
Monica

Rest

2005-12-07T13:52:00.000-07:00

Since everything in my life relates back to two things this is going to be a combination of them both. Those two things are God and my family. Our two children are sick. Not drastically ill but sick enough to make them miserable. Both of them have decided that whenever they get sick they will resist sleep as much as possible. Instead of getting more rest so their bodies can fight off what ails them they make it worse. Lately I have been somewhat spiritually sick as I alluded to in my most recent post. It is hitting me now that I did the same thing my children are doing now. Oh how I must have frustrated God just as it frustrates me with my own kids! When we are spiritually sick we need to rest. We need to stop being everything to everyone that is not necessary and spend time reading and praying and fully seeking Him. It is great to serve others but it takes much longer to heal when we do not rest in Him. When I was going through this time of drought I was taking meals to others, trying to help others in every way and in doing so I fooled myself into thinking God would be happy with this even if I wasn't taking the time I needed to just sit at His feet amd listen. I no longer can make excuses as to why I don't have time. I must make time to rest and get the strength I need to continue serving others but in a way that truly glorifies and pleases Him.

Where did this monster come from?

2005-12-05T13:12:00.000-07:00

Let me dust off the cobwebs of this blog for a second. I am typing one handed so this won't be nearly as long as I'd like it to be. On my lap is our beautiful six month old daughter and in the other room is our amazing almost three year old son. I have been in a daze of sorts for the past few months; however I was quite unaware of it until recently. I knew my passion had dropped off a bit and I knew something in my heart wasn't exactly right but I kept on going. I prayed and I read and now God is revealing unto me something that my former self would have much rather continued to ignore. I know this will bring growth and it will move me closer to Him but it is also very painful. My flesh responds by asking how will I ever be able to change so many things that have been me for so long. My spirit eagerly awaits the changes that will eventually take place. For years I have prayed daily that God would give me all I needed to become the wife, mother, and servant He has called me to be. Over those years God has revealed things like these vto me and it always changes me forever but I always wonder - where did this monster come from? - where was this hiding all this time? I thank God He did not show me these things all at once or I would have been extremely discouraged and overwhelmed and I doubt any change would have taken place. He is constantly answering my prayer that I might be who He has called me to be but there are so many things that are wrong with me I know I will never achieve what I desire until He calls me home. I must strive to change the things He reveals to me so that by some miracle of His power He might somehow be glorified in this life I live each day. I am so thankful for His grace and His mercy. Also His strength that He provides because I do not have any to do this in my own self!

Don't Waste Your Life

2005-09-09T10:34:00.000-07:00

I am currently reading a book of this title authored by John Piper. It is one I highly recommend for everyone.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20
19Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

2 Timothy 2:15
15Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a workman who does not need to be ashamed and who correctly handles the word of truth.

1 Corinthians 10:31
31So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

These three verses are among many in the Bible that plead with us to live a life that is not wasted. We must honor God and glorify God in everything we do. That must be the ultimate desire of our heart, to live every moment in thought and deed for His glory!

My son has been obsessed with Veggie Tales lately, of which we own one DVD that he has watched numerous times. One of the Bible passages depicted on this DVD is that of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego.

Daniel 2:48-3:30
48 Then the king placed Daniel in a high position and lavished many gifts on him. He made him ruler over the entire province of Babylon and placed him in charge of all its wise men. 49 Moreover, at Daniel's request the king appointed Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego administrators over the province of Babylon, while Daniel himself remained at the royal court.
1 King Nebuchadnezzar made an image of gold, ninety feet high and nine feet wide, and set it up on the plain of Dura in the province of Babylon. 2 He then summoned the satraps, prefects, governors, advisers, treasurers, judges, magistrates and all the other provincial officials to come to the dedication of the image he had set up. 3 So the satraps, prefects, governors, advisers, treasurers, judges, magistrates and all the other provincial officials assembled for the dedication of the image that King Nebuchadnezzar had set up, and they stood before it.
4 Then the herald loudly proclaimed, "This is what you are commanded to do, O peoples, nations and men of every language: 5 As soon as you hear the sound of the horn, flute, zither, lyre, harp, pipes and all kinds of music, you must fall down and worship the image of gold that King Nebuchadnezzar has set up. 6 Whoever does not fall down and worship will immediately be thrown into a blazing furnace."
7 Therefore, as soon as they heard the sound of the horn, flute, zither, lyre, harp and all kinds of music, all the peoples, nations and men of every language fell down and worshiped the image of gold that King Nebuchadnezzar had set up.
8 At this time some astrologers came forward and denounced the Jews. 9 They said to King Nebuchadnezzar, "O king, live forever! 10 You have issued a decree, O king, that everyone who hears the sound of the horn, flute, zither, lyre, harp, pipes and all kinds of music must fall down and worship the image of gold, 11 and that whoever does not fall down and worship will be thrown into a blazing furnace. 12 But there are some Jews whom you have set over the affairs of the province of Babylon—Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego—who pay no attention to you, O king. They neither serve your gods nor worship the image of gold you have set up."
13 Furious with rage, Nebuchadnezzar summoned Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. So these men were brought before the king, 14 and Nebuchadnezzar said to them, "Is it true, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, that you do not serve my gods or worship the image of gold I have set up? 15 Now when you hear the sound of the horn, flute, zither, lyre, harp, pipes and all kinds of music, if you are ready to fall down and worship the image I made, very good. But if you do not worship it, you will be thrown immediately into a blazing furnace. Then what god will be able to rescue you from my hand?"
16 Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego replied to the king, "O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. 17 If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. 18 But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up."
19 Then Nebuchadnezzar was furious with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, and his attitude toward them changed. He ordered the furnace heated seven times hotter than usual 20 and commanded some of the strongest soldiers in his army to tie up Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego and throw them into the blazing furnace. 21 So these men, wearing their robes, trousers, turbans and other clothes, were bound and thrown into the blazing furnace. 22 The king's command was so urgent and the furnace so hot that the flames of the fire killed the soldiers who took up Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, 23 and these three men, firmly tied, fell into the blazing furnace.
24 Then King Nebuchadnezzar leaped to his feet in amazement and asked his advisers, "Weren't there three men that we tied up and threw into the fire?" They replied, "Certainly, O king."
25 He said, "Look! I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods."
26 Nebuchadnezzar then approached the opening of the blazing furnace and shouted, "Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, servants of the Most High God, come out! Come here!" So Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego came out of the fire, 27 and the satraps, prefects, governors and royal advisers crowded around them. They saw that the fire had not harmed their bodies, nor was a hair of their heads singed; their robes were not scorched, and there was no smell of fire on them.
28 Then Nebuchadnezzar said, "Praise be to the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego, who has sent his angel and rescued his servants! They trusted in him and defied the king's command and were willing to give up their lives rather than serve or worship any god except their own God. 29 Therefore I decree that the people of any nation or language who say anything against the God of Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego be cut into pieces and their houses be turned into piles of rubble, for no other god can save in this way."
30 Then the king promoted Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in the province of Babylon.

I can't help but wonder how many of the people who claim to be followers of Christ would (and do) bow to idols rather than facing the persecution that we have been told we must expect to endure. It is truly a wasted life if we fear the things of this world so much that we will deny God the glory and praise and honor that He is so worthy of!

I have more to say on the matter but my son just woke up from his nap so it'll have to wait.

Hello Again

2005-09-04T04:10:00.000-07:00

Forgive me for not posting in quite some time. Even now, it is only my inability to fall back to sleep that has brought me here. It is hard to believe it is been two months since I last updated this blog! I pray that any who are reading this, (I can't say I blame anyone but myself if the number reading is zero) are well and strong in the Lord. As for myself, I am in the midst of a struggle. It is not something I will get into but I do request the prayers of any who feel led to do so for strength to know and do what is right by God's standard.

Even so, in God's faithfulness, He has given me this verse in my inbox this morning:
For you make me glad by your deeds, O LORD; I sing for joy at the works of your hands. -- Psalm 92:4

Ephesians Chapter 1

2005-07-08T12:39:00.000-07:00

This is such an awesome chapter!

1Paul, an apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God,
To the saints in Ephesus, the faithful in Christ Jesus:

2Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

3Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. 4For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love 5he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— 6to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. 7In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace 8that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding. 9And he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, 10to be put into effect when the times will have reached their fulfillment—to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ.

It never fails to leave me in awe that we will are held as holy and blameless in his sight! We, mere sinners who deserve nothing but death, are chosen to be the objects of the love of God! That love, which cost His son to die a horrible death for our sins, is far above anything else...truly it is God's grace that has made this possible!

11In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, 12in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. 13And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, 14who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession—to the praise of his glory.

We have been given the Holy Spirit. What a gift that is! It wasn't until a few years ago that I ever even gave the Holy Spirit a second thought. I knew it was part of the trinity, but that was about all I knew (shamefully). It wasn't until I started researching this gift that God has bestowed upon believers that I came to know the power and the awesomeness of His Spirit being with us constantly.

15For this reason, ever since I heard about your faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for all the saints, 16I have not stopped giving thanks for you, remembering you in my prayers. 17I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. 18I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, 19and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, 20which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, 21far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come. 22And God placed all things under his feet and appointed him to be head over everything for the church, 23which is his body, the fullness of him who fills everything in every way.

This prayer is something we should be hoping for all believers. It is vital that we remain humbled enough to know that we need God's wisdom and revelation to further know and understand who He is and what He has purposed in our lives.

The word of God is so encouraging! I pray it also encourages anyone who might read this.

Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp

2005-07-06T12:53:00.000-07:00

Recently, I entered into a summer Bible study about parenting. I was told we were going to be using the book "Shepherding a Child's Heart" by Tedd Tripp. I was a bit leary when I heard this because the only book I like to use is the Bible. However, after only attending one of the meetings, I was completely convicted in the way I had been parenting our children. This book directs you straight back to the Bible and as far as I can tell is determined to teach biblical truths and biblical principles for parenting rather than offering a formula to raise children with good self-esteem. Here is an excerpt from the book:

Let's take a familiar example from any home where there are two or more children. The children are playing and a fight breaks out over a particular toy. The classic response is "Who had it first?" This response misses heart issues. "Who had it first?" is an issue of justice. Justice operates in the favor of the child who was the quicker draw in getting the toy to begin with. If we look at this situation in terms of the heart, the issues change.

Now you have two offenders. Both children are displaying a hardness of heart toward the other. Both are being selfish. Both children are saying, "I don't care about you or your happiness. I am only concerned about myself. I want this toy. My happiness depends on possessing it. I will have it and be happy regardless of what that means to you."

In terms of issues of the heart, you have two sinning children. Two children are preferring themselves before the other. Two children are breaking God's law. Sure, the circumstances are different. One is taking the toy that the other has. The other is keeping the advantage. The circumstances are different, but the heart issue is the same - "I want my happiness, even at your expense."

You see, then, how heart attitude direct behavior. It is always true. All behavior is linked to some attitude of the heart. Therefore, discipline must address attitudes of the heart.

Now let's go to Scripture.

Proverbs 4:23 NIV
23 Above all else, guard your heart,
for it is the wellspring of life.

Deuteronomy 10:12 NIV
12 And now, O Israel, what does the LORD your God ask of you but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul,

Jeremiah 17:10 NIV
10 "I the LORD search the heart
and examine the mind,
to reward a man according to his conduct,
according to what his deeds deserve."

Luke 12:34 NIV
34For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

Hebrews 4:12 NIV
12For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

Luke 6:45 NIV
45The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.

I admit I am horribly guilty of putting a band aid on the wound and not getting to the source of the infection. I am determined to change that now. My eyes have been opened and I cannot look at it the same again. I can no longer plead ignorance, and I must take the steps to change this.

Here is another excerpt from the book:

I have seen families get hold of the principles in this book. I have seen parents shepherding happy, productive children who are alert to themselves and life. I visited such a home recently. The family was alive and vibrant. Teenage children were at home, because home was an exciting place to be. Father and Mother were held in high esteem and sought out for advice. The Bible and biblical truth blew through every conversation - not with stifling heat, but like a refreshing life-giving breeze. In this home, five generations have kept the faith and a sixth is learning that God is the foundation of life in whose light we see light.

These are things worth striving for. This is a vision worthy of sacrifice.

I am sure as I continue on with this study and reading this book inbetween changing diapers and building towers I will be blogging on this issue again. I would love to give a copy of this book to every Christian parent there is, but since I cannot I will highly recommend it instead!

"All by self"

2005-07-05T13:09:00.000-07:00

This is a post inspired by my two year old son. It is about something that brought me to my knees earlier today. It's amazing how much God has taught me through the lives of these children He has entrusted my husband and me with. My son has recently entered the "all by self" stage in whitch he knows he needs help but is so determined to do it by himself that he ends up getting frustrated with whatever he is attempting to do. Today I was brought to the realization that it is this same exact thing that keeps so many of us from where we should be in our walk with Christ. It is our knowing we need help from Him but refusing to accept it that keeps us going so slowly, stops us, or in the worst cases takes us backwards along our path.

I have to say there are times when I feel like I am the only one who struggles with living a Christian life. When I look at people I don't see their struggles because everyone puts their best act on for others to see. I am guilty of doing it as well, although inside I long to get the help and support I need as a Christian in these inward battles I face. I seek the strength of God in these things but I am aware that He gives us the rest of the body to help us in times like these to turn us back to where we need to be. Maybe if we weren't all so intent on doing things by ourselves we would start moving towards the goal and be able to help others struggling to run this race as well.

I am not the keeper of the money in our home, but when I think of the woman who gave all she had, I long to be that woman. Not in a monetary sense, although that is very important, I long to give everything of me for the glory and service of God. I know that He has given us His Spirit and by the power of that Holy Spirit we all can come closer to giving our all, but first we have to stop trying to prove something to everyone that we are capable of doing it on our own. We aren't capable of doing it on our own, and God never intended for us to do it that way - that is why we have a family of believers called the church...I encourage us all to use those that He has given to us.

Our Newborn...

2005-06-21T11:22:00.000-07:00

It has been over a month since Rachel joined our family. She has brought even more joy and awe into our lives. To know that God has entrusted us with the lives of two precious children is beyond my comprehension at times. Though the task is difficult, I would have it no other way than to spend every moment of every day trying to instill in them Biblical values and to just love them with a godly love. There are so many things about newborns that I had forgotten. It is hard to commit every feeling, every movement, every smile to memory and to be going through it all over again is a miracle in itself. I am so thankful for the opportunity to watch this baby grow every day, and soon we will see more of her personality and watch her go from baby to toddler to little girl to woman. Her big brother is also such a blessing to observe as he gives her countless hugs and kisses and tries to include her in so many things. Of course we often have to tell him that she is too little now and he will have to wait a bit before she can do all the things he can. It is such a blessing to be called Mommy and to know all that God has given my husband and I in these two children. It is our prayer that we will guide them in the right direction so that just as it says they "will know which way to go". I know this post is a little off topic for my blog but I had to talk about the two gifts God has given us.

John Chapter 14

2005-06-21T10:56:00.000-07:00

A section of this chapter is written on the tombstone of a 17 year old boy who died on Mother's Day of 2000. Every time I read it, I immediately remember him. However, I could read the book of John every single day if I had the time and always find something new to grow from.

"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father's house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am. You know the way to the place where I am going."

Thomas said to him, "Lord , we don't know where you are going, so how can we know the way?"

Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. If you really knew me, you would know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him."

Philip said, "Lod. show us the Father and that will be enough for us."

Jesus answered: "Don't you know me, Philip, even after I have been among you such a long time? Anyone who has seen me has seen the Father. How can you say, 'Show us the Father'? Don't you believe that I am in the Father, and that the Father is in me? The words I say to you are not just my own. Rather, it is the Father, living in me, who is doing his work. Believe me when I say that I am in the Father and the Father is in me; or at least believe on the evidence of the miracles themselves. I tell you the truth, anyone who has faith in me will do what I have been doing. He will do even greater things than these, because I am going to the Father. And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory to the Father. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.

"If you love me, you will obey what I command. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever - the Spirit of truth. The world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him. But you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you. Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me. He who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I too will love him and show myself to him."

Then Judas (not Judas Iscariot) said, "But, Lord, why do you intend to show yourselve to us and not to the world?"

Jesus replied, "If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. He who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me.

"All this I have spoken while still with you. But the Counselor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

"You heard me say, 'I am going away and I am coming back to you.' If you loved me, you would be glad that I am going to the Father, for the Father is greater than I. I have told you now before it happens, so that when it does happen you will believe. I will not speak with you much longer, for the prince of this world is coming. He has no hold on me, but the world must learn that I love the Father and that I do exactly what my Father has commanded me.

"Come now; let us leave.

I'm going to stop here, because if I continue on I probably would not stop until the end of the book! I was going to add some thoughts to this but I know that it stands alone and all that needs to be said is already here.

Brief Update

2005-06-20T10:45:00.000-07:00

In the past few days since my mom left (she was here for eleven days) I have felt more than a little overwhelmed. I have struggled to find a balance in my life that allows me to be a good mom to each of my two kids, a good wife to my husband, keep the house up, attempt to cook, and continue to grow in my spiritual walk. It got to where I literally thought it was impossible to do these things every day! I have admittedly made little time for reading Scripture in the last month under the guise of needing to care for my children and not having enough time. A few nights ago I was given a few hours of quiet and was able to write in my prayer journal for the first time in two weeks. I also opened my Bible looking for encouragement. God, in His faithfulness, provided just that and brought me to my knees in shame. I was making it about me rather than making it about glorifying Him! I was ashamed to think of how I had failed to seek out the only one who could make my seemingly impossible tasks possible! As I opened my Bible I was led to parts where blind men see and lame men walk and somehow I knew I was grossly underestimating God! Of course He could give me the strength and the patience to be who He intends me to be! I am just thankful I have a wonderful husband who can put up with me when I start to get overwhelmed and I can always count on him not to flatter me or justify my feelings but to really build me up biblically!

Our New Arrival!

2005-05-20T12:01:00.000-07:00

We had our baby girl on Friday, May 13th at 9:29 am. We are enjoying every minute of being a family of four! I probably will not be posting much for a while since it is quite a task caring for two instead of one.

Ephesians Chapter 4

2005-04-22T12:42:00.000-07:00

This chapter is full of so many great things that I know I cannot do justice to in the short amount of time I have to post this. However, I would like to attempt to at least scratch the surface on the elements presented here.

Unity in the Body of Christ
1As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. 2Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. 3Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. 4There is one body and one Spirit–just as you were called to one hope when you were called– 5one Lord, one faith, one baptism; 6one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.
7But to each one of us grace has been given as Christ apportioned it. 8This is why it[a] says: “When he ascended on high,
he led captives in his train
and gave gifts to men.”[b] 9(What does “he ascended” mean except that he also descended to the lower, earthly regions[c]? 10He who descended is the very one who ascended higher than all the heavens, in order to fill the whole universe.) 11It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, 12to prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up 13until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.

Live a life worthy of the calling you have received! What a complicated task that can be at times, for the calling on our lives is such a great one! Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Humility is such an important aspect of the Christian life, I am not surprised that it is mentioned first in this short list of things. Without sincere humility we cannot honestly live out gentleness, patience, nor love (or any of the fruits of the Spirit listed in Galatians 5:22)

He has given us all different gifts for His service, so that this body (this one body of believers, called the church) may be built up continually until the day when we are all in unity in faith and knowledge of Christ! We are at different levels of maturity right now, but one day we will all have the whole measure of knowledge and faith in Him! Once again, humility is key in coming to this unity. Just to give you an idea of how often humility is stressed in the Bible here are a few verses:

2 Samuel 22:27-29
27 To the pure you show yourself pure,
but to the wicked you show yourself hostile.
28 You rescue those who are humble,
but your eyes are on the proud to humiliate them.
29 O LORD, you are my light;
yes, LORD, you light up my darkness.

2 Chronicles 7:13-14
13At times I might shut up the heavens so that no rain falls, or I might command locusts to devour your crops, or I might send plagues among you. 14Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and heal their land.

Psalm 25:8-10
8 The LORD is good and does what is right;
he shows the proper path to those who go astray.
9 He leads the humble in what is right,
teaching them his way.
10 The LORD leads with unfailing love and faithfulness
all those who keep his covenant and obey his decrees.

Psalm 69:31-33
31 For this will please the LORD more than sacrificing an ox
or presenting a bull with its horns and hooves.
32 The humble will see their God at work and be glad.
Let all who seek God's help live in joy.
33 For the LORD hears the cries of his needy ones;
he does not despise his people who are oppressed.

Psalm 149:3-5
3 Praise his name with dancing,
accompanied by tambourine and harp.
4 For the LORD delights in his people;
he crowns the humble with salvation.
5 Let the faithful rejoice in this honor.
Let them sing for joy as they lie on their beds.

Proverbs 3:33-35
33The curse of the LORD is on the house of the wicked, but his blessing is on the home of the upright.
34The LORD mocks at mockers, but he shows favor to the humble.
35The wise inherit honor, but fools are put to shame!

Philippians 2:2-4
2Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one heart and purpose.
3Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. 4Don't think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing.

James 4:6-8
6He gives us more and more strength to stand against such evil desires. As the Scriptures say,
"God sets himself against the proud,
but he shows favor to the humble."[a]
7So humble yourselves before God. Resist the Devil, and he will flee from you. 8Draw close to God, and God will draw close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, you hypocrites.

1 Peter 5:5-7
5You younger men, accept the authority of the elders. And all of you, serve each other in humility, for
"God sets himself against the proud,
but he shows favor to the humble."[a]
6So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and in his good time he will honor you. 7Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about what happens to you.

To humble yourself is not easy, especially in a world where it is encouraged and fully accepted to look within one's self for everything they need and to just follow our own hearts! However, this is not what we are commanded to do and in light of scriptures such as those I have quoted here, I pray that it will become a top priority to humble ourselves more and more each day.

Back to Ephesians Chapter 4:

14Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. 15Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. 16From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.

The world is full of the teachings spoken of here, and often times they are disguised as the light instead of the darkness they really are. Many of those who say they are born again "Christians" are being thrown every which way by all the new "revelations" that these teachers preach. We must remember that we are under Christ, He is the head! Only when we remain humbled before Him and seek Him can we be a true member of His body!

Living as Children of Light
17So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. 18They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. 19Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.
20You, however, did not come to know Christ that way. 21Surely you heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. 22You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; 23to be made new in the attitude of your minds; 24and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.

25Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. 26“In your anger do not sin”[d]: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27and do not give the devil a foothold. 28He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need.

29Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

These are not particularly easy verses to follow, as we all struggle with our sinful nature, and to say we do not the truth is not in us. However, I find these verses to be so very encouraging! We are encouraged through these words to strive for good, to do the right thing, to be humbled, to have the fruits of the Spirit and to remember that we are not the only member of this great body that Christ has assembled with Himself being the head, directing us in every direction. Obedience is necessary if we are to stay on the vine, for our branches can easily be cut off and replaced. Remember, if we are silent the very stones will cry out in praise to Him!

Luke 19:37-40
When he came near the place where the road goes down the Mount of Olives, the whole crowd of disciples began joyfully to praise God in loud voices for all the miracles they had seen: "Blessed is the king who comes in the name of the Lord!""Peace in heaven and glory in the highest!" Some of the Pharisees in the crowd said to Jesus, "Teacher, rebuke your disciples!" "I tell you," he replied, "if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out."

Warnings from Israel's History

2005-04-13T10:21:00.000-07:00

1 Corinthians 10:1-13
6Now these things occurred as examples to keep us from setting our hearts on evil things as they did. 7Do not be idolaters, as some of them were; as it is written: “The people sat down to eat and drink and got up to indulge in pagan revelry.” 8We should not commit sexual immorality, as some of them did–and in one day twentythree thousand of them died. 9We should not test the Lord, as some of them did–and were killed by snakes. 10And do not grumble, as some of them did–and were killed by the destroying angel.
11These things happened to them as examples and were written down as warnings for us, on whom the fulfillment of the ages has come. 12So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! 13No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

If you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall! I have found, that the times I am the most sure of myself and sure I am standing firmly where I should be, I am about ready to fall flat on my face and realize that I haven't been trusting in God nearly as much as I need to be. It seems when I am full of the most humility, knowing how small I am and how big God is and drawing from that, I am the closest to where I should be. It's funny, but I never think of myself as "standing firm" in those times, rather I see the sinner I am and the righteousness of Christ and holiness of God and I put my faith in them instead of the sinner. I often struggle with sin, daily even. However, I find myself more and more often taking that way out. God has convicted my heart of many things in the past few years, things that have been challenging to say the least and I have failed and fallen back into those things at times. However, it is usually at that time I "think" I am standing firm and doing right until God once again shows me how wrong I am when I lean on my own understanding. We must be careful to take heed of the warnings given to us, such as those from the history of Israel and others. I doubt they expected the wrath of God to be so immediate! We must live each day to glorify God and remember that it could be our last.

1 Corinthians 10:31-33
31So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. 32Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God– 33even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved.

Colossians 1:15-23

2005-04-13T09:55:00.000-07:00

15He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. 16For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. 17He is before all things, and in him all things hold together. 18And he is the head of the body, the church; he is the beginning and the firstborn from among the dead, so that in everything he might have the supremacy. 19For God was pleased to have all his fullness dwell in him, 20and through him to reconcile to himself all things, whether things on earth or things in heaven, by making peace through his blood, shed on the cross.

What an amazing description of Christ this is! It is so comforting to know that Christ, the one whom I put my faith in daily, is the same Christ that is written about here! How, when knowing these things, can I worry or complain about things in this life? His blood was shed for me, the blood of the one who created all things and for whom all things were created! What a humbling thought that should be to each one of us who take His name as Christians!

21Once you were alienated from God and were enemies in your minds because of your evil behavior. 22But now he has reconciled you by Christ's physical body through death to present you holy in his sight, without blemish and free from accusation– 23if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel. This is the gospel that you heard and that has been proclaimed to every creature under heaven, and of which I, Paul, have become a servant.

Oh how unworthy we are of this reconciliation considering our past willingly sinful lives! To think that we will be held holy in his sight (holy is not a word that I would ever use to describe myself, though I know He is making me increasingly holy as I walk with Him, I know I am so far from it) without blemish and free from accusation (I could be accused of so many things, and I am far from being clean). This thought brings me so much joy, to know that one day I shall be in His presence and He will not see me for the wrongs I have done but see me in this new light. However, we must be careful to continue reading for the next words are vital - if you continue in your faith, established and firm, not moved from the hope held out in the gospel. So many have strayed from the gospel and sadly many are anything but firm when standing for Christ and the gospel that offers us this hope! May each of us pray daily that we are a better steward of the gospel message and that we may become a humble servant to the One who bought us at such a great price!

Matthew 12:22-37

2005-04-06T10:09:00.000-07:00

22Then they brought him a demonpossessed man who was blind and mute, and Jesus healed him, so that he could both talk and see. 23All the people were astonished and said, “Could this be the Son of David?”
24But when the Pharisees heard this, they said, “It is only by Beelzebub,[a] the prince of demons, that this fellow drives out demons.”
25Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand. 26If Satan drives out Satan, he is divided against himself. How then can his kingdom stand? 27And if I drive out demons by Beelzebub, by whom do your people drive them out? So then, they will be your judges. 28But if I drive out demons by the Spirit of God, then the kingdom of God has come upon you.
29“Or again, how can anyone enter a strong man's house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man? Then he can rob his house.
30“He who is not with me is against me, and he who does not gather with me scatters. 31And so I tell you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven. 32Anyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man will be forgiven, but anyone who speaks against the Holy Spirit will not be forgiven, either in this age or in the age to come.
33“Make a tree good and its fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and its fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognized by its fruit. 34You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. 35The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. 37For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.”

The Pharisees were desperate to discredit the Son of God, but His response is one I suppose they did not expect. Too many "Christians" forget that we are to be recognized by our fruit. Our fruit must be that of righteousness and not that of the world. We must be careful not to partake in Godless speech, but only in speech that glorifies Him and praises Him.

Reflecting God's Glory

2005-04-04T05:20:00.000-07:00

Philippians 1:9-11

9And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, 10so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, 11filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ–to the glory and praise of God.

We are here to reflect the glory of God. Of course, the only one who successfully did this His entire life was our Lord, Jesus Christ. However, this passage describes what it is that we need to reflect His glory in our every day lives. We must daily find ourselves seeking out His Word and His wisdom. We must seek Him out in all things, and not look to the world around us. We must have the fruits of righteousness.

Ephesians 5:8-10

8For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light 9(for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) 10and find out what pleases the Lord.

Galatians 5:22-26

22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and selfcontrol. Against such things there is no law. 24Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. 25Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. 26Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.

We must remember that our goal each day is to glorify Him. His grace and His mercy have allowed us to have such an awesome purpose in this life and we cannot hesitate in fulfilling that purpose!

1 Thessalonians 2:1-6

2005-04-03T02:48:00.000-07:00

1You know, brothers, that our visit to you was not a failure. 2We had previously suffered and been insulted in Philippi, as you know, but with the help of our God we dared to tell you his gospel in spite of strong opposition. 3For the appeal we make does not spring from error or impure motives, nor are we trying to trick you. 4On the contrary, we speak as men approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel. We are not trying to please men but God, who tests our hearts. 5You know we never used flattery, nor did we put on a mask to cover up greedGod is our witness. 6We were not looking for praise from men, not from you or anyone else.

As Christians, we must remember this each time we present the gospel. We have been entrusted with the good news, the greatest news there is or ever will be! We cannot misuse that trust, though many of the Christians today are afraid of any opposition and are using much flattery to try and "win" people to Christ. People of the world are looking for "acceptance" and they long to hear the words that God loves them just the way they are and does not expect them to change. However, it is clearly stated many times that we are required to change and it is not acceptance but grace that God offers. When we witness to people we must keep in mind that this is the Great commission and we are entrusted with the greatest treasure on Earth. We cannot be looking for praise from men, but rather we must be seeking approval from God. That is the only thing that really matters!

Content

2005-03-31T05:36:00.000-07:00

Philippians 4:11-13

11I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

I hear the last verse quoted quite often in the Christian community, and rightly so, but it is often forgotten the context in which it was given. God has been teaching me many things regarding this lately, and it seems to go hand in hand with:

Proverbs 3:5-7

5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6 in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.

These have given me much comfort since becoming a Christian, however I realize that I all too often start leaning on my own understanding and looking at my present circumstance. It is when I have the rug pulled out from underneath me that I start to realize just how far I have come from where I am supposed to be. Things have not been easy for us in many areas the past few years. However, I am aware that it is all in answer to many prayers that I have prayed. Daily I ask God to mold me into the person He wants me to be, a person who is bold in their faith, a woman who is able to be a crown to her husband, a mother who is godly and raises a child who will go the right way when he leaves our home, etc. These trials are molding me into that person, ever so slowly it seems. We really do have to just give it over to God and in all things seek Him and His will. To lean on our own understanding is always detrimental to a key part in the Christian faith...we are no longer content with what He has seen fit to put into our lives and our paths become anything but straight. I have many times ended up going in circles all because I forgot these things. I'm sure if I were to look back on the path of my life very few parts would be straight...there would be many curves, circles, and even backtracking. This grieves me, but I know God is making me increasingly Christ-like and He is making me holy as we go through these difficult times so all I can say is thank you for answering my prayers in such an awesome way!

Breathing Poison

2005-03-30T21:35:00.000-07:00

We live in a broken world –
You and I.
Every moment a heart cries
A silent tear and a sigh.

Money is thought to be the cure –
Only bringing greed.
We keep trying to fill the void –
Keep trying to breathe

But the air is poisonous here –
And we gasp for more
All of us slowly dieing –
If only we were poor.

Hard to believe what we thought was good
Would lead only to our demise
We always knew we could see
But never opened our eyes.

That would take too much time
And we all know that equals money
Didn’t see the value of it all –
Of an everlasting eternity.

But wait!
What about them?
They must be doing something different
They aren’t dieing men!

Our skin is slowly corroding –
Insides the blackest black
But they remain as before –
Bodies still intact!

It’s not our fault we breathe in poison
It’s the air we were given!
Quick ask them their secret
Where have they been?

In the arms of the Lord
They cried
“We knew if we stayed here
we would surely die!”

“Don’t you recall
the lesson you were taught?
To live in sin and breathe it’s air
Rejected the freedom He bought!

Jesus died upon that cross
Innocent as the lamb of God
And you chose to brush it off –
Pretending you forgot.

But we’ve been here all along
Witnessing in His name
We spoke only His truth –
And you chose Satan’s game.

Quick repent – fall on your knees
He loves you too and knows your heart
And if you’re not sincere –
Then here is where we part.”

We must fall on our knees –
Declare Jesus as Lord and Savior
To reject his gift
Is to live apart from Him forever

I can think of no greater tragedy
Because there is none
It doesn’t have to be
The time has surely come –

To stop indulging in sin
Live only to please Him
For to please Satan
Is only breathing poison!

Monica

1/17/01

House of Yahweh and the Sacred Name Movement

2005-03-28T20:18:00.000-07:00

This is a follow up post to the Sacred Name Movement I posted last month. This is considered to be a "doomsday cult" by many. Rick Ross has collected some excellent information regarding this group if you are interested in finding out more http://www.rickross.com/groups/yahweh.html
Let Us Reason Ministries has a great section on what they teach as far as the names
http://www.letusreason.org/Sacname.htm
There is also some information at this site
http://www.sacrednamemovement.com/

The reason I am linking to these instead of writing about it myself is mainly because I feel they have done a great job and I would just be repeating what they have already said.

In Memory

2005-03-28T20:07:00.000-07:00

Loved Ones

So many memories...
so hard to remember.

Not so much as a whisper
to let me knowthat I would never
see you again.

I pray memories never fade
because pictures
will never be able to capture
the essence of your soul.

I've learned my lesson well
that tomorrow is never
a promise.
These lives we live
are but a vapor.

Hope emerges
even after breath is gone,
hope that again
I shall see your smile.

Heaven is beyond my imagination,
but it has to be
even more spectacular
now that you reside there.

Monica
7/23/04

I Heard You Cry

2005-03-27T19:30:00.000-07:00

I heard you cry
in the privacy of your room;
behind the chambers of your heart
I saw a tear falling there.

I saw your pain
beneath that mask of illusions;
I shared in your anguish
as you tried to shine.

I laughed with you
when you held such joy;
an erruption of happiness
that moved your soul.

I saw you smile
in a way you never had
the day you came to me,
seeking my face tearfully.

I'm here with you now
picking you up
if ever you fall
and carrying you each day.

You feel my presence
and pray in silence
wishing you were a better witness
trying too hard to shine.

You already do, my child,
people see me in you
because I show them all
we've been through.

Dear child, your beauty is not
what you try to be
but the things in private,
that I alone have seen.

Monica
12/4/01 Edited 8/27/04

He is Risen!

2005-03-27T19:22:00.000-07:00

What a marvelous day this Resurrection Sunday remembers! Oh, the hope that is in the fact that our Lord has been raised from the dead! As Paul said, without the resurrection our faith is useless and we are to be pitied above all men. Worthy is the lamb of God...worthy of honor and glory and power!

It amazes me how so many who claim to be in Christ can take the sacrifice that was made and the miracle of the Resurrection so lightly. I cannot begin to understand how a Christian can shy away from the subject of what has saved us from our sin and given us hope of life eternal! Yet, there are many who will go this entire weekend without ever mentioning what took place other than a short prayer before Easter dinner. May we take time not only this weekend, but every day to remember what has been done for us while we were still sinners and the love that has been shown to us through the sacrifice of God's only Son!

I am brought to tears every time I think of the price that was paid because of the sins I have committed. Oh, how unworthy I am of such a sacrifice! I fall to my knees knowing that He has accepted me not by my own merit but through the work of the Cross. This Resurrection Sunday I pray that every Christian is touched by His divine nature and His unfailing love and devotes themselves to becoming increasingly Christ-like daily as we are being made holy.

2005-03-27T19:15:00.000-07:00

I apologize for not updating this blog in quite some time. Things are hectic with a two year old running around and being in my eigth month of pregnancy right now means I am usually catching a nap or trying to keep the house up during the times when I would normally be posting. However, I feel it is very important to keep this up as well so I am going to try to do a better job of updating it regularly instead going in spurts. There is so much I want to put here!

Right now there is a very urgent situation taking place which everyone should be aware of by now and that is the Terri Schiavo case. This lady is being starved to death by our own government. This has been emotionally exhausting for me to think about so I cannot imagine what it must be like for her family. I cannot even begin to wrap my mind around the pain they are going through right now. Please keep this woman and this family in your prayers constantly! Also, here is the e-mail address to Gov. Jeb Bush: jeb.bush@myflorida.com
Unlike what many have said, there is much he could do for this woman! He has the power and is in the position to save her life. Join us in pleading with him to step in NOW!

Sacred Name Movement

2005-02-28T10:50:00.000-07:00

Having a family member involved in this cult has made me want to inform others about it. There are many things that seperate this group from Christians. The one that they emphasize the most is the use of the sacred names Yahweh and Yeshua. They see our Jesus as an idol and some would even venture to say that we are following the antichrist! They do not stop there. They also believe all truly saved people will celebrate the feast days and follow the dietary and other laws of the Old Testament. Of course, they pick and choose which of these they want to follow. They claim that when it says that these things will be done for generations to come it means that we are never to stop doing them. However, they fail to acknowledge that all of these laws (save the 10 Commandments, given to show us that we are sinners) were given in order to make the people acceptable to God. We have now been given that through the sacrifice of His only Son! I am not saying that it is wrong for them to do these things, as I know it speaks of the believer who thinks they must do such things, however I have a big problem with the way they attach so much onto salvation. They say we must do this and that as though we are still trying to earn our salvation on our own merit! Every time I speak to my brother I can tell that he looks down on me and thinks I am going straight to hell because I do not use the sacred names (I have no objection to those who do, mind you) and I do not eat the right foods and I vaccinate my child(ren), etc. In an earlier conversation I had with him he told me that I should not be praying to God because there are many gods. I said my God has a capital G. His response was "How does He know that?". Of course, I replied..."He knows everything! How could He not know I am speaking to Him or praising Him or worshipping Him?" I am aware of the Scripture that says not to do things that would make a weaker brother fall. We must be careful (I now use the words Heavenly Father and the Son, etc.) but we cannot allow someone to distort the gospel message and attach things onto the grace and mercy and love of God given to us through the death of His Son! There are many more details on this cult that are disturbing, and I pray time allows me to edit this post in the near future and add more to it, but I wanted to get this out there while it was on my mind.

To be loved like that...

2005-02-27T11:10:00.000-07:00

I have read through Song of Solomon before. I have earnestly sought out the intentions of God in marriage, and I am constantly learning new things through the Holy Spirit revealing things to me in God's Word. A few days ago, I read through this book again. Oh, I found myself thinking, to be loved like that! To have a love for each other that it cannot be contained, it cannot be quenched and there is no sign of being too busy, too tired, too irritated, etc. The thing that stands out to me the most is that this love is so pure, so genuine. It is not something that is forced nor said out of flattery. Oh, to have a love like that! I am again reminded that Christ is our husband and He has given us all of these things...oh we are loved like that!!! To think, He is as captivated with His bride as on the day we first became His! His love has never waned, though mine is so lacking at times. It then ocurred to me that He has said to me many times, I want you to love me like that. Oh the shame that came over me in that instant! I have prayed daily that God would mold me into a better wife, a better mother, a better servant. However, it is time I started devoting as much time, words, service, etc. to Him as I know He has for me. I have heard a lot about the 5 love languages lately: time, words, service, gifts, and touch. I see every single one of these layed out so beautifully in the Song of Solomon. It is such an honor to know that this book not only applies to our marriages here on earth but even moreso to our marriage to Christ!